Choices and Promises
by Question28
Summary: Harry Potter faces the threat of friends turning to enemies, enemies to friends, and a promise he feels he must keep without a doubt. Trying to stay afloat in his growing anger, he tries to help Draco Malfoy before he is consumed by a growing fear within himself. Reviews Welcome
1. Choices and Promises

Chapter 1

I woke to snow falling outside the castle, it wasn't a heavy blizzard nor was it a small flurry; it was a gentle snowfall with the coldness of early November following close behind. When I put my bare-feet upon the floor I shivered from the chilled stone floor briefly before heat began to run through me, the effects from the fireplace across the dormitory. Looking at my watch I knew it was still early but I decided to head down to breakfast anyway, no sense waiting for Ron as he'd still be about an hour with Hermione following close behind. Ever since the end of the war she had gotten nearly as bad as he was in the mornings, there had been times where shed nearly miss a class for being asleep. I shook my head to think of the change she was going through. As I dressed I peered around at the sleeping forms of my friends, all of them were changing…I only wished I could see a change in myself.

It had been a hard few months following the end of the war. A lot of grief, a lot of trials and even more rebuilding. The castle took a few weeks before it was in nearly the exact shape as it was before, a few of the professors decided to, since they were working on it anyway, improve a few sections here-and-there and the overall completion was finished near enough of three months. I, like Ron and Hermione, were offered places in the Aurors, it just didn't feel right anymore and so I told them no. Ron, however, had accepted on the condition that he finish school first which was only because Hermione had insisted upon it. Ever since I told them I had declined the offer, which even Hermione didn't do though she was offered a position in a relatively new branch of the Aurors, Ron hadn't really been the same with me and I could tell Hermione had been spending less and less time with me. Why? I don't really know but I've been too exhausted to really try anymore. Everywhere I go people would be in private conversations, notes passed and looks shared while I walked through it all with seemingly no idea what was going on.

I walked down through the corridors with a disinterested expression on my face. To be honest…I didn't really care all that much about finishing school, it wasn't that I didn't care about finishing a job or having a career it was the fact I hadn't been able to move on yet and it appeared as though everyone else had already. Professors largely left me alone in class and the students did as well, the younger ones stared of course but the older ones treated me no different than a regular student, which was good except for the fact they also avoided me. It bothered me at first but now it seemed like any other day.

"Potter," Draco Malfoy acknowledged as he descended the stairs opposite me, turning down the same corridor as I. He looked ragged and a shell of who he once was, his hair was longer and his features gaunt. My childhood rival however spoke with the same determined voice that I could never forget however.

"Malfoy," I replied without breaking stride but my eyes shot back to the stairwell he came down, for a second I thought I saw a flicker of movement. I even went so far as to almost stop but Malfoy kept walking and began speaking.

"Early morning today?" he asked quietly as we came closer and closer to the Great Hall.

I gave a shrug, forgetting about what I thought I saw. "Didn't feel like waiting any longer."

"Same here…" he nodded with his hands deep in the pockets of his trousers. "…Pansy is an absolute monster in the mornings. A total witch if you pardon the pun of course. All those bloody women are you know, the Greengrass sisters and their friend…she's the worst of them all, Tracey Davis. She's the one to look out for believe me. One time she nearly choked me out when I woke her accidently as I was leaving a bit too early." Raising an eyebrow at him he returned the gesture and shrugged. "What?"

"Nothing Malfoy," I said diplomatically, before walking into the Great Hall for the first time that day. I noted the absence of every student and even most of the teachers, except for a few scattered around it was pretty much empty. Walking towards the usual table I was hardly surprised when Malfoy followed me and sat across from me.

"I feel like a bit of bacon and eggs today," he explained, reaching for a cup of tea first however. I pushed the bowl of scrambled eggs towards him and he toasted his mug lightly in gratitude. "First snow of the year today."

I nodded, looking up and out of the windows. "I'll probably go out for a walk later."

"Why in the name of Merlin would you do that? It's cold, ice cold mind you, and you'd get all wet from the blasted snow."

I laughed, genuinely laughed, before seeing his look. I reached up and pulled at the already wrinkled red and gold tie. "Because it's fun Malfoy, relaxing even being completely secluded in nature, just you out there with the snow falling down around you. Once, way before I knew I was a wizard, probably when I was about seven I think, I snuck out of my cub-my room and just walked in the snow for hours. Never felt more relaxed really."

Malfoy looked at me for a moment before he began to pile food onto his plate, at least he was eating I thought, and then looked back up at me. I thought for a moment he was going to comment on my stuttering about my room, I almost started to sweat when he went in a different direction than I expected. "I was never allowed to go out into the snow or rain for that matter, mother always said it wasn't proper."

"Well of course not, that's why it's fun," I took a bite out of a bacon strip as I spoke, he listened quietly and seemed to contemplate my words before I gestured towards him. Positively relieved I didn't have to explain anything about my first 'bedroom'. "You can come with me if you like."

"I may take you up on that offer," he explained before going back to his breakfast. I too returned to my breakfast and the next ten or so minutes it was quiet while we ate. Once and a while we would share a glance and one time he raised his glass again to toast it, I laughed and did the same.

Where did our friendship come from? Well I'm not so sure it's a friendship rather than two people simply sharing each other's company. It all started way back in July, the trails had been finished and I had spoken on behalf of Malfoy and his mother, as well as Pansy Parkinson and a few other Slytherins…though only Malfoy knows I spoke on his behalf since I interrupted the trial in true Dumbledore fashion. Since then we had met up for drink once or twice before school started, I had returned his wand to him and offered to help repair his family's mansion but Malfoy had politely declined in favor of leaving the mansion for good. No place would take him in and so I awkwardly extended an invitation to stay at the cottage up in some isolated Scottish village, a property I had recently discovered I owned, for the duration of the summer. After a day or two he owled me and accepted. Somehow, when we got to school, it became almost natural to meet up in the morning and share early breakfasts or go to the kitchens for a late meal. While doing so we chatted about nothing in particular.

"Did you hear me Potter?"

I looked up from my plate. "No, sorry, what did you say?"

"I said I feel like this year is different."

Taking a sip of orange juice I found myself unable to disagree with him. "That's true-"

He looked like he wanted to talk more on the subject and I couldn't blame him on that, I quickly discovered once he got comfortable around someone he was incredibly hard to shut up. There had been times when I said goodbye at least three times and yet he kept talking, I didn't know he actually had so much to say, in all the years I knew him before the war I couldn't even say we actually spoke once when it wasn't arguing or calling each other names. But I knew I couldn't get too annoyed by it, he had no one to talk to and it was quickly becoming apparent I didn't either.

"Hello Harry Potter…" the dreamy voice of Luna met my ears and I turned to face her with a smile. "…and hello Draco, it is pleasant to see you overcoming your furniturephobia."

Draco frowned and watched as Luna skipped down to her own table and began to dig into her own breakfast. He looked down at himself a little self-consciously before looking back up at me to see me laughing quietly, holding a piece of toast in my hand.

"What the devil was she talking about?" Malfoy demanded.

"Relax Malfoy."

* * *

Malfoy and I had split up at the Great Hall with the intent to take a walk down by the lake later that evening. We stayed until most people were getting up and heading down to breakfast, he left the table before any of my housemates saw and when he did, I decided I was in need of a walk before my first class. He had a free period while I was stuck having to head to one of the classes I actively despised; Divination. But there was one good thing about that class, because Voldemort was killed, she didn't keep prophesizing my death every two days. She was one of the professors who generally ignored me now, I sat at the far back and to the right, and I was alone in the class as Ron had finally dropped it just as Hermione had all those years ago. Thinking of them, I never saw them come down to breakfast before I left, must have really been running late that morning.

It was still snowing when I took my seat, I took my robe off and set it on the chair beside me so now I wore only my white button up and tie. I rolled up my sleeves and leaned back, preparing to snooze through this class until a girl came up and sat beside me. I peered over and saw it was Pansy Parkinson. I was surprised she walked over to me, after her much public attempt to hand me over a few months ago it seemed as though she avoided me at all costs, even after she was pardoned…which I helped do of course yet she didn't know…I was like a leper or something.

"You need to come with me right now," she said quickly, gathering my robe in her arms and grabbing my backpack. Her hair was pulled up in a hurried bun while her robes seemed disheveled as if she had been running, she was breathing heavily too. I could tell she was attempting to keep from causing a scene but it wasn't working too well.

"Why?" I asked stupidly, standing up from the table as she stood. I blinked in confusion because she had a tear in her eye. "Alright let's go!"

Without waiting for any allowance from the professor, who I doubted had any idea of the scene we were making in our hurried escape, we charged out of the classroom. Along the way I stuffed my robe into my backpack, not wanting to carry it and for some reason I was unbearably hot. Pansy seemed to have a destination in mind and after seven years of being in the castle I knew exactly where she was going, for some reason she was leading me to the hospital wing. I tried several times to talk to her but she ignored me, as we got closer she began to run and students and teachers in the hall began to stare. I pushed past Ginny, nearly knocking her into a Ravenclaw student I'd never seen before, all I saw was dark brown hair.

She rushed through the open doors and down towards the very last bed. I slid to a halt with another confused look on my face. Hermione stood near the bed talking to the Headmistress while on the bed lay Draco Malfoy. I turned and saw Ron sitting on another bed with his head down looking at the floor and for a moment I thought Ron had hurt Malfoy before I realized he must have been on patrol with Hermione. Pansy was concerned and pushed by Hermione, taking Malfoy's hand gently, he wasn't awake and I knew he wasn't faking. I took a step closer and saw just how bad he was.

He reminded me of the beatings I would receive when I was little. His face was bruised, blacks and blues and purples covered nearly every inch of his face while his right arm was in a sling, peering more closer I was willing to bet he would be receiving treatment for a broken limb. Walking next to the bed I saw bruises running up his arm and when pulled back the sleeve I saw the bruises went up much farther. In addition to his arm in a sling his leg was nestled gently on two pillows. His breathing was ragged to say the least.

"What happened…" I asked quietly.

Professor McGonagall frowned and walked towards the bed, Hermione followed behind. "My dear he was attacked while walking through a corridor on the other side of the school. Someone must have put a silencing charm on him for no one heard him scream."

I raised my eyebrows at that. "Attacked him? Why? He's pardoned."

"We know mate…" Ron said, standing up. I looked at him and he seemed distant. "…we don't know why."

Pansy began to cry on the other side of the bed. "Well maybe we should find out!"

I nodded. "I agree completely, what's being done about it?"

Hermione had her thinking face on and stepped before McGonagall. "We could start with questioning people who saw him last and go from there but there isn't much we can do to be honest."

"If he was one of your precious heroes another war would be being waged Granger, this is wrong and he needs to get justice!" Pansy shouted at Hermione, who looked as though she was ready to argue and began to say something when Ron sighed and pulled Hermione away.

"She isn't worth it Hermione," he said to her and Pansy scoffed.

"Both of you relax…" McGonagall ordered. "…my dear we will do anything to help find his attacker or attackers. Believe me when I say that Miss Parkinson, he will receive the best care and we will began questioning students and portraits immediately. Mr. Weasley and Miss Granger will you come with me please."

They left the hospital wing without another word and I was left with two Slytherins, not entirely sure why Pansy had gone out of her way to bring me down here. She seemed as though her crying would never cease and well Malfoy wasn't exactly going to wake up so I began to leave, there was nothing for me to do there anyway when she abruptly looked up and nearly shouted at me.

"Potter!" is what she yelled. I know, totally original.

I stopped and turned. "What?"

"I need your help."

"With what?"

I don't really know why but she looked up at me with the saddest expression I had ever seen, it was honest and vulnerable. With her black hair falling over her eyes and her light eyes brimming with tears, make-up running down her face, it was hard to look away. I stepped back towards the bed without looking away.

"Please…" she whispered, bringing Draco's hand closer to her.

"You want me to find the person who did this?" I asked hesitantly.

She nodded. "He trusts you, s-so I trust you. I don't trust Granger or Weasley. They don't care about us, they don't care about him, and they certainly don't care that we aren't criminals. To them we're scum. Why would they care to help?"

To be honest…I was beyond conflicted. Here I was standing in front of a mangled Draco Malfoy while my "friends" were supposed to investigate this attack with the Headmistress and one of inner circle of Slytherin was asking for my help. I ran a hand through my hair and frowned at her but after a moment I found myself unable to give a worthy enough answer and so I numbly nodded and then began to leave.

"And Potter!" Parkinson called from her seat.

I stopped, turned and took a step forward. "Yes?"

Pansy stood and walked over, she wiped her eyes. "I managed to get it approved to have Draco moved to his dorm later today, no one but me and McGonagall know this. I think something bigger is going on, I don't know what but I don't trust anybody enough to have Draco stay here."

What was I supposed to do? Where would I even start? And then a strange thought over took my mind. If someone did attack Malfoy, or someone, could I trust anyone? One thing I did know was that I needed advice.

* * *

Malfoy had told me about it and after a while I had gone down myself to clear the past with a certain fellow, a former enemy. It was in a very far off and secluded section of the school which I think he would have wanted anyway. The painting had been there for decades but now he visited it almost daily, just sitting in the field of flowers, lilies to be exact.

"Ah Potter of course you would show up to ruin my walk today," Severus Snape said as he placed his hands behind his back and walked more towards the front of the painting. He seemed happy.

I sat against the opposite wall. Well slid down it more or less and he seemed to take that as a bad sign because he raised an eyebrow…believe me that's a lot of emotion and effort.

"What is it?" he asked, his tone a bit gentler. "Does it have to do with know-it-alls and weasels?"

I shook my head. "Malfoy was attacked by someone or a group of people."

"What? Is he alright? Is he alive? Who did it? How hurt is he?"

"He's banged up but being cared for, he should be alright in a few weeks. Parkinson is with him right now."

Snape seemed extremely concerned yet when I mentioned Parkinson he seemed to relax some. "And from your attitude I seem to get the feeling you are showing some concern."

"Yes I am, he's my…" I hesitated as I tasted the words on my tongue. "...my friend."

A laugh came from his mouth even though the topic was dire.

"That Potter is something I never would have thought. You see he isn't so evil after all? He was just a child thrown into a hellish situation. Enough of that however. Tell me more about this attack and leave nothing out."

After I was finished with my tale, and doing as he asked to not leave anything out, he seemed to be deep in thought for a moment before he even reacted to it. He began to pace in his field of flowers for a while, I didn't know how long or how short of a time but I sat there and watched a painting of a man pace in a painting of a field.

"And you accepted to help her?"

I nodded weakly. "Yes but I don't know what I can do, if anything."

Snape sighed. "You are so like your father with the whining, you can do anything Potter, you are the so-called Chosen-One. You're telling me that Granger had all the brains? Merlin you will be a useless Auror."

"I'm not going to be an Auror any more, I turned down their offer after the war. Don't know what I'll be but I won't be working for them."

"My, my, you have changed."

Ignoring his statement I stood from the floor and walked closer. "I don't know what I should do! I don't even know how I could even help him!"

"You did seem to have a knack for getting into trouble with your cloak of yours, surely you could do something with that once again."

I frowned. "I actually don't have it."

"What!" Snape shouted in disbelief. "You lost one of the Hallows you stupid boy?"

"What? No, no, of course not. I gave it Luna Lovegood to watch over."

Snape's eyebrow peaked again as he went silent. "Did you now? And why did you do such a thing?"

"Because Snape…" I said quietly and with my eyes shut. "…I don't trust myself with the Hallows. I lost the stone and snapped the wand, the cloak was the only thing left. After the war I was afraid of who I may become. I got rid of the wand to make sure I couldn't hurt anyone and the cloak…I didn't want to be corrupted by those things. I wanted to be normal for once. I gave it to Luna because she is innocent and brave. She would never abuse it."

"Potter you always have to be dramatic don't you?" Snape sighed, folding his arms across his chest. "Tell me how you'd be corrupted by your cloak?"

"A lot has changed since I was eleven."

Snape shook his head. "Even as a painting Potter I can tell you're hiding the answer."

"I am afraid I still have _Him_ inside my head."

Nodding, Snape looked at me truly for the first time during this talk. "He is gone Potter, whatever is in your head is completely you. That cloak belongs to you, do not be fearful of it. Giving it to Lovegood would be smart, but you need it. You seem as though he accepted to help my godson only because Pansy was crying. Let me remind you of a time when I truly thought you made a wrong decision. Your sixth year you nearly killed Mr. Malfoy, would have in fact if I had not saved his life. Do you not think back and wish you had done differently?"

I stepped back from the painting and blinked. I hadn't even thought about that for months, years even. I did almost kill him and what did I do? I went and hid my book, so selfish and uncaring. I made a book more important than saving a life. He was a death eater sure…but he was a teenager like me.

"Help him Potter, do right by him. He seems to trust you, for whatever reason, he has told me several times in fact."

"Parkinson said the same thing."

Snape nodded. "He tells her everything."

"Where should I start?"

After a moment Snape looked up at me again. " _We_ will begin to try and find some reason as to why a person or persons would hurt him."

"We?" I asked him.

"He is my godson boy, I will do what I can." He looked at me a moment longer before a new question popped into his mind. "Are you not supposed to be in class?"

I shrugged and spoke honestly. "No one will notice."

"Anything is possible I suppose, look Potter, you obviously care more about Draco than you let on. Maybe what you need is to break away and discover just who you are in this new life. Your friends are ignoring you-"

"How did you…Malfoy?"

Snape nodded. "He seems to give you a great deal of thought. Whatever you did to make him come round, I fully believe you might have saved his life Potter at least for the time being. I think if you do intend to help Miss Parkinson you must become independent of the things hindering you. You say you are afraid of being like _Him_ then prove you are not. Help Malfoy, help your former rival."

* * *

"Harry we need to talk," Hermione commanded as I walked into the common room after classes had finished for the day. I didn't do much schoolwork nor did I really pay attention all that much, my mind was on Malfoy and oddly enough Pansy Parkinson as well. Hermione was standing with her arms crossed over her chest and Ron sat on the couch behind her, I saw Ginny sitting close by.

"What about Hermione?"

She frowned. "You've been ignoring us for days now and then Malfoy is suddenly attacked and Pug-Face Parkinson rushes into the Hospital Wing, her robes all messed up and pulling you along?"

"Are you seeing her?" Ginny fired out.

I laughed and gestured to Ginny. "Excuse me? Are you giving me an intervention? Why would you care anyway Ginny? Last time I remembered you were the one seeing someone else."

She looked hurt for a moment but held her tongue, I half-expected Ron to say something in her defense but he simply sat there watching. I don't know what has gotten into him lately but he seemed much more quiet and calm lately, almost as if he was silently observing a chess match. Hermione shook her head at me and walked over to Ginny, placing a hand on her shoulder. A few of the other students in the room turned to look, I saw Dean sitting next to Neville; they both looked concerned.

"Harry she made a mistake, there is no need to hurt her feelings. We've noticed you've been spending quite a lot of time with Malfoy, and you even had him stay at one of your properties, what is going on with you?"

Ignoring her attempt to rile me up by mentioning 'hurt feelings', I turned to glare at Hermione as something Pansy said dawned on me. "Why aren't you searching the corridor still? There are always clues to be found, that's something we all learned."

"Professor McGonagall has assured us that the professors will be doing the search while we make sure students are being protected."

I waved my arms. "I don't see any other student hurt, do you? Why only Malfoy? Why was a former death eater the only one to get hurt? And before you say anything, if someone really wanted to hurt other students they would have had the chance too by now, so take that shite back and tell me why you aren't out there helping?"

Ron spoke to me for the first time during the argument. "Why do you care so much about Malfoy, mate? He betrayed all of us, he fought against us, he tried to kill us, Dumbledore, and he tried to-"

"Protect his damn family Ron, he was protecting his family!" I shouted, pointing my finger at him with a scowl on my face. "Are you going to stand there and tell me you wouldn't have done the same if you were in his position? He tried to do what he thought was right!"

Ginny looked in pain. "You don't know what he did to us while you were gone."

"Oh really? Well let me tell you something that he did do. When we got captured, he pretended not to know us, any of us. Pretended that he couldn't recognize us. He saved our bloody lives and you're standing here not giving a damn about how he was attacked after Professor McGonagall specifically told Parkinson-"

Ginny stood from the chair. "Why do you keep bringing Pug-face up? What has she done to you?"

"What the bloody hell are you talking about?" I yelled, stepping forward with fire in my eyes, my previous train of thought forgotten as I confronted Ginny's claims. "What is this? Why are you confronting me now? I want answers."

The common room was silent now, around twenty eyes were staring at me as though I was about to curse Hermione or Ginny, I spotted Neville stand as did Dean and across the room Seamus but they stood where they were. Ron was now watching me very carefully, the snow that had been falling had given way to rain and it now pelted the windows. Walking towards them closer Ron finally stood and stepped in front of me while Neville sped over behind me.

"Calm down mate," Ron commanded, his hands were balled into fists at his side and he seemed like he was ready to fight.

I breathed in deeply and looked around, seeing Neville with his wand out and Hermione too. "What is your problem? Are you going to hex me? Curse me? For eating breakfast with Malfoy? For having a _conversation_ with Parkinson? You think maybe you should be out there looking for the people who hurt Malfoy instead of trying to intimidate me?"

"They aren't the ones who drew their wand first Harry," Neville spoke up from behind me. When he spoke I turned and shot a weird look his way before I felt something in my hand, it felt oddly like my wand. Glancing down, my wand was in my hand, ready for use. I stepped back and stared at it. I didn't even know I had drawn it.

"Would you really have hurt us?" Hermione asked, I could see a tear in her eye, she seemed genuinely fearful. I slid my wand back into the arm holster and backed up away from everyone, it felt like second year and fourth year and fifth year, all the staring and murmuring, all of the secret looks, they were afraid of me.

"Of course not," I muttered.

Ginny shook her head. "I don't know you anymore. First you're speaking up for known enemies, then giving homes to them, and now you're best-friends with the one who almost killed Dumbledore? And probably shagging the Pug-face too."

"Who told you about Malfoy almost killing Dumbledore? I never-" I looked at Ron and Hermione, my face dropping and my anger rising once again. "…what else have you told her? Have you told our lives to anyone who would listen? Some of the things I told you were supposed to be just that for you! What else have you said?"

Hermione started crying. "Harry please…"

"Tell me!" I shouted and charged forward with an intent to question them further when Ron intercepted me and grabbed my shirt by the collar. He pushed me back and I tripped over a foot rest, we both toppled over, as we fell he shouted in my face.

"Don't ever try to hurt-ah!" he screeched in pain when he rolled over me and his face hit the very edge of the fire, his screams consumed the common room and there was a mass of people rushing toward him. I felt arms grab me as I tried to lunge for him to help but they dragged me away and I started yelling for them to stop. Dean and Seamus picked Ron up and rushed him out of the common room with Hermione and Ginny behind them, Neville kneeled down next to me as I tried to stand but he kept me down.

"We all saw Harry, he pushed you," Demelza told me as she placed a handkerchief to the wound on the back of my head from where it hit the floor. Neville kept me down, but I was in no mood to fight him, besides not a single one of them could defeat me if they tried. Demelza eventually helped me sit up and gave Neville a very pointed glare and he stood, when he did so I saw something on the edge of his wrist but it looked like an ink splotch so I thought nothing of it. Demelza helped me to my feet and then gave me a weak smile. "Are you alright?"

I nodded but when I took a step I grimaced and held a hand to my head.

"We should get you to the Hospital Wing," she said and began to lead me away. I saw Neville standing in front of the students, all of them standing behind him, my last sight of them was one student putting a hand on Neville's shoulder which I thought was sort of odd.

"Thanks," I told her after a few moments of walking down the nearly abandoned corridors, she was leading me through the long way towards the Hospital Wing but I didn't mind, probably to put some time between us and Ron's group.

Demelza glanced up at me, yeah I was short but she was a bit shorter. She had dark brown hair, darker than I remembered from sixth year, and she seemed a bit pale but then again she always really did. She seemed thinner now, the last year couldn't have been easy on her just like anyone else. "You looked like you needed someone to back you up? It wasn't right what they did."

"Welcome to my life," I tried to joke but she frowned. "Honestly though, thank you."

She smiled. "You're welcome Harry, I don't know what is up with them but hopefully they will come around eventually."

I shrugged to her. "I'm not sure, they seemed set on making me the bad guy back there."

"I don't understand what the fuss is, sure Malfoy did bad things but so did we in that battle, we all did a lot to survive. Why aren't they feeling remorse for saying those things about Malfoy or Pansy? Ginny was even going after Astoria Greengrass and she was nowhere near the battle, I know because she was with me."

Demelza kept walking and I turned to look her over. She seemed like she had matured considerably, to tell you the truth I had never really talked to her about anything other than out on the pitch but now I was interested by her seemingly sudden loyalty to me. Something about it though nagged at my brain, for too long I had been too trusting, too easy to forgive. As I looked at her she seemed genuine but what if she was a part of this…this conspiracy? I needed to test her trust.

"Demelza…" I stopped, she kept going, but I grasped her arm and forced her to stop. "…can I trust you?"

She raised an eyebrow. "Harry I know you and I don' really know each other but yes, yes you can."

I smiled gently and then instead of heading off to the Hospital Wing I set off for a much different route. We descended the corridors, cutting through passageways and short-cuts, until we came to the very bottom of the school. We were in the Dungeons.

"Umm Harry…why are we down here?"

I moved forwards to the wall where I knew the Slytherin common room was and I placed my hand upon the wall and whispered the password. The hidden door swung open and we were presented with a plush and posh common room that was once the center of life for a Slytherin. The tapestries and rugs were still very richly made yet everything seemed to be a bit dimmer, not as boisterous. A lot of students, younger ones and older ones, were seated around the common room in the middle of school work and other things, at first unaware of our presence. However when I stepped in I found Blaise looking at me with a confused expression before he stood and marched over to us.

"Potter? Robins? What the bloody hell do you think you're doing? This isn't your dormitory, you aren't welcome here," Blaise said in a very careful and practiced voice. He put a hand out to stop me but I ignored him, took Demelza's hand, and walked forward until I came to the stairs leading to the dormitories. Looking back I saw the Slytherins were watching our every move very carefully, a few had their wands out. I ignored them too and looked at Demelza.

"Wait here okay?"

She gave me a look.

"They won't hurt you, will they Blaise?" I called out.

Demelza shifted her gaze to the dark skinned Slytherin just in time for him to shake his head. "No, no, they won't. We aren't going to hurt a friend of Malfoy's."

I nodded at him and then started up the stairs without another word. My heart was beating in my chest. I was beginning to think I was playing a very dangerous game here. I didn't understand what exactly was going on but I knew I needed to get to the bottom of this to help Malfoy out like Snape said. No matter what, I was convinced of this.

"Parkinson…" I said aloud. "…can I come in?"

From beside Malfoy, sitting on his bed, Pansy looked up at me and her mood seemed to change. She stood from her place and nodded, yet when she saw the blood on my scalp she walked over, grabbed me by the arm and pushed me down on the nearest bed.

"Who did this to you?" she asked in a concerned voice, which surprised me. "Did this happen because of what I asked you to do?"

I shrugged at her. "Sort of I guess. I got into an argument with Ron, Hermione, and Ginny in the middle of the common room. Everyone was there basically. Ron pushed me back and I fell, he hit the fire and they took him to the Hospital Wing. Demelza Robins is down the stairs there, I think she can help us."

Pansy stepped back and then looked down. I studied her for a moment. She had pale skin, but it wasn't a pale that looked off-putting or sickly, it was a gentle paleness that gave quite a bit of beauty to her. Her hair was tied back into a ponytail and her eyes had tears in them but now she seemed determined, fierce even. My eyes travelled up her body, she wore her school skirt and her white blouse, her tie was hanging nearly untied around her neck. I had never really looked at her before.

"Potter?" she spoke my name timidly, holding her arms across her chest, the fierceness giving way to a shy side I never knew she had. "Maybe we can save that for another day or something and stay on topic?"

"I'm sorry!" I yelped, standing up and stepping away from her. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable, uh I um…"

She smiled a white toothy smile. "It's alright."

A minute or two of awkward silence followed before I decided to do what I came here to do. I walked over to Malfoy with Pansy following behind closely. Malfoy looked a bit better, most of the bruises were still there though they seemed to have been healed a bit which was a very good thing.

"This may seem farfetched…but I think there's a conspiracy here."

Pansy leaned her head against the bed post, her arms across her chest yet again and her head cocked to the side. "A conspiracy? How so? And by who? Worse still, whose being targeted and for what reason?"

Looking down at Malfoy I moved the sleeve of his left arm up and then pointed at the grotesque image upon his arm. No more was the dark mark but in its place was a series of straight scars that ran across his skin, they were old, about a month or two ago. I pointed to where the mark would be and looked at her.

"Anyone who bears this mark and didn't go to Azkaban," I said aloud.

Pansy however frowned at the scars. "You knew of these?"

"Unfortunately, he did that when I allowed him to stay at one of my properties. I bandaged up his arm when I found him on the bathroom floor."

She smiled weakly. "Thankfully you were there I suppose, or else I would be frightened to see how far he would take it."

Malfoy stirred but he did not wake. Pansy ran a hand across his forehead, brushing his bangs out of the way of his eyes. She laughed silently before it became a fit of tears.

"He always hated how his hair got in his eyes," she told me as I stood to the side looking at her in a sympathetic way. Awkwardly I reached out a hand and placed it on her shoulder, at first she grew rigid at my touch but then I felt her small hand grip mine ever so lightly.

"I'm going to get to the bottom of this," I announced. "I think Slytherins are in trouble from the rest of the houses, I think there is a gang or organization working out there that would be similar to the DA but they are seeming a bit more hostile. I can't be certain of anything yet but I think Hermione and Ginny are involved, possibly Neville, who knows it could be all of my house involved in it. Maybe even Ron."

"What do you think their cause is? To hurt us?"

I shrugged. "Possibly to hunt down the remaining death eaters? I don't know to be honest but I think my 'friends' are the key."

"What will you do to them?" she asked me slightly nervous of the answer.

I glanced sideways at her. "Firstly I'm going to follow them and see what I can find out, then I'm going to decide from there. I can have Demelza help me."

"You trust her?"

I shook my head after glancing at the door. "Not completely, she seemed a bit too eager to help me, but a good way to test her loyalty is to give her a bit of info here and a bit there to see what gets spread around. In the mean time I'll ask her to watch the common room and if anything weird happens. That's why I brought her here but told her to wait down there, I don't know if she's honest."

"That's very Slytherin of you Potter," Parkinson confessed.

With a laugh I shrugged off her comment. "The hat wanted to put me in Slytherin…maybe I'm finally figuring it all out."

"Be c-careful please," she muttered.

With one last look towards Malfoy I left.

* * *

I must be entirely truthful with you, despite my conscious telling me it might not have been the right thing to do, I was completely using Demelza as a way to 'leak' what I had supposedly been doing to Hermione and Ginny, of course Ron too. I had no way of knowing if that was what she was doing or if she was keeping my secrets, the only thing I did know was that Ron stayed in the hospital wing for almost a full week. In that time I visited Malfoy regularly in the Slytherin Common Room, I was not hindered by Blaise or even Theodore Nott, one who I believed would be my strongest opponent. However all of them seemed just as concerned for Malfoy as Pansy and so let me come and go freely without hindrance.

I have to confess as well that I became obsessed with Malfoy's attack and the fact no one else was since. I went to the corridor later that night without Demelza or Snape, even without my cloak, I was walking up and down it for hours until I concluded whatever had been here it was gone. Irritatingly there was only one portrait in this corridor, it had not been used for quite some time, and the portrait was just a painting of a patch of the night sky with three blue dots at the center that formed a triangle with a bit of imagination. I stood in front of it for ten minutes just staring but nothing happened. I left empty handed and displeased.

I followed Hermione and Ginny, even Neville who I found to be acting strangely as well. At first I did so without my cloak, I walked unseen amongst the crowds of students and watched them in classes, I watched as they took notes or ate, I watched them from across the grounds while they took walks or talked while sitting on benches. My behavior had only worsened in classes because of it, I hardly slept, I didn't do homework and I didn't study. I sat there and took notes, but not for the classes, I took notes of what I knew and what I needed to find out. I knew Hermione and Ginny were definitely up to something, and that's where the cloak came in. I used it every night, I stayed underneath it constantly while they were on patrol, Ginny having been made a prefect along with Ron, as Hermione was Head Girl of course. I began to eat only what I needed and did so in the company of the House Elves, mainly Kreacher who I had asked to help as well. He was all too happy to search through Hermione's things, he returned with nothing of interest saying she only had books in her trunk along with clothes. Ron's trunk I searched myself, ignoring his privacy and that of Dean's, Seamus', and Neville's. I found nothing. I waited and watched the professors but nothing was happening, it was…normal.

Demelza meanwhile had become sort of a friend to me. She would sit with me while I ate and in classes she would sit beside me, I half expected people to spread rumors we were dating but I never heard them. We investigated the corridor several times, sometimes with Snape and most times without. We retraced Malfoy's steps but found nothing at all. She began to worry about me, and after a few days I could see she meant it, it was not an act. I told her things about Malfoy, told her how he'd been in a hard life and how I tried to help him, hoped I did. She seemed to respect me, seemed to care, I developed a caring for her and understood when school work or Quidditch practice got in the way.

I began to watch Slytherins when the days went on and nothing new was happening. Nott and Blaise were womanizers, smooth talkers, and smart….but they were cowards and afraid. They travelled in twos, always in twos, never a step ahead or a step behind the other. A group of Slytherins followed them, Astoria Greengrass was one of them, her sister Daphne always at her side. One person I watched more than anyone else was Pansy; when I visited Malfoy I would sit at the end of the bed opposite his and watch Pansy take care of him, smooth out his hair and smile at him when he began to recover and I would grow worried when she saw him struggle, it wasn't hard to see it but he had come close to death. She cried, I held her, she laughed and I smiled. I brought Malfoy food every day, I told her I was alright when she knew I wasn't. She didn't leave the common room much and when she did I ordered Nott and Blaise to go with her, they took my orders without hesitation, she smiled when I said I wanted to make sure she was safe, they remained silent when I did so.

I looked into the mirror the other day, when I went to the bathroom to be alone. My eyes were gaunt behind my glasses and my face seemed pale, my hair was long and as unwieldly as ever. My hand felt strange, I let go of the sink and it shook violently, frowning, I tightened my fist until it stopped but it never did. After that I didn't look in mirrors.

Days and days passed and nothing was happening, it was too normal and too perfect. I needed to find out what was happening but nothing was there to be found. Like I said, everything was normal…and that frightened me.

"You need a break," Pansy told me when I visited Malfoy one night, he was sleeping, almost fully recovered by now and the need for my visits were for naught, I simply did it because it allowed me the chance to rest. She sat beside me on Blaise's bed, holding my hand. "You've pushed yourself too far."

"I promised you I would find out what happened."

"I know that Harry…" she said quietly, looking up at me. "…I only hope it didn't make things worse."

I shook my head. "I don't think so."

"Are you sure?"

"I keep going because my promise means something to me and because I'm doing it for you and for him."

Pansy smiled at me from beneath her long black hair. "Thank you Harry."

Glancing to my right I tightened my grip lightly. "Of course Pansy."

Her smile lasted until I left…I wished I stayed longer.

* * *

We were walking down the corridor, Demelza and I, and it was around dinnertime the day after my night sitting with Pansy; most people were in the Great Hall feasting while I and my friend were strolling. She seemed extra worried as of late and, in my attempt to prove to her I was not I decided to take a walk with her and chat about random things. I was beginning to enjoy her presence. She was walking near me with a sweater on while I wore one as well, it was ragged and from my time on the run.

"Have you been sleeping?" she asked me quietly.

I shrugged at her words. "Sometimes I sleep for a few hours, most times I study my notes."

"Do you think maybe it's time we stop this?"

I stopped walking. "No."

"There hasn't been another attack and it's been almost three weeks, surely something would have happened by now don't you think, Harry?"

"They could be onto us, they could be waiting for one of us to slip."

Demelza frowned and took a step back. "Harry, who could that who be? How long have we been at it? How long have we tried in vain to help Malfoy? We have nothing, this spying and following people has gotten us nowhere. What else can we honestly do to help him?"

"I don't know yet but I am going to find out with or without you," I told her harshly and began to walk away. She didn't follow and I stopped, I had something to say. "Before you make a judgement call on me, before you get offended, just understand that one time I did something to him that I have to make-up for, I owe it to him. So you can go back to the common room if that's where you want to be, or better yet go to the Great Hall and feast with the others, I don't give a bloody damn."

Demelza had tears at her eyes, I was seething with anger and she knew it. In all honesty she really hadn't said anything that bad, nothing new that I hadn't thought of myself. But I wasn't willingly to give up on Malfoy because I couldn't find my way.

"Demelza-"

"Stop Harry, just stop," she told me as she brought her right arm up and brushed back a strand of hair. It was then I saw something on her wrist, from a far it looked like a blotch of ink but the more I studied it the more it looked like a tiny triangle. The same that Neville had on his arm, the same triangle that was spotted on the painting in the corridor Malfoy was attacked. She was one of them. My eyes softened and my shoulders slumped, my heart breaking. I backed up against the wall of the corridor and shook my head.

"No…" I said, it was barely a whisper.

Demelza turned and her eyes widened when the triangle was exposed. She lowered her arm and stepped towards me with her arms out as if to pull me into a hug. The tear at her eye began to fall and it fell fast. I shook my head at her, mouthing the word 'no' again and again before my rage over took me. I rushed forward and grabbed her arms, I gripped down tightly and scowled at her; she broke under my gaze and strength and began to cry harder.

"Why?" I snapped.

She didn't answer, only cried. I looked around and saw an empty classroom to my left. I pushed her forward and she stumbled into the room, falling to the ground. I closed the door, locked it with a charm, and then used another to silence the room. I turned and saw her crying, holding her arms around her chest.

"I'm sorry!" she cried, looking up at me.

I reached down and grabbed her shoulders, dragging her up, I pushed her against the wall. "I trusted you! I thought you were helping me Demelza! I thought you were my friend! I trusted you!"

She didn't fight me or deny it.

"Who are they? What do they want?" I yelled.

Again she remained silent.

"Answer me now…" I told her. "…Draco was hurt, I want to know why. They almost killed him, did you know that? I don't care you're crying, I don't care I hurt you! I want answers and I want to know why my friend was attacked. Answer me now!"

As I yelled a desk across the room shattered into a thousand small splinters.

"Please…" she muttered, and that's when I backed away. I looked down at my hands, how they shook and ached, my eyes glanced up at her and she was sliding down the wall crying and begging for forgiveness. Demelza hugged herself as she cried and I felt ashamed, scared, and hurt. I kneeled down beside her and reached out to her. She fell into my arms and cried. "…I'm sorry."

"Why did you do it?"

She spoke against my chest. "I thought it was a worthy cause, I thought they were right."

"Who?"

"The Triumphant…" Demelza confessed. "…a group of students and professors, of aurors and parents. They united to forever keep dark magic locked away, former death eaters were included in that. But for them they had special ideas on how to handle them. I joined during the summer, I thought it was worthy."

I shook my head. It was unbelievably to think professors and parents would allow such things to happen to students. My anger rose as I slowly understood what was going on in the castle, no Slytherin was safe. The only course of action was to do the one thing that would keep them safe, get them out of the castle as fast as possible. I couldn't wait, there hadn't been another attack but there was no way to tell for sure, it had to be tonight.

"Are Hermione, Ron, Ginny and Neville in the group?"

She nodded. "Yes."

"When did they join? Tell me!"

Demelza rubbed her wrist. "They helped start it."

I didn't know them anymore.

"Who is its leader?"

"I don't know, there are many leaders. Hogwarts has its own leader but I don't know who it is, only the Lieutenants do."

"You were told to spy on me?"

Demelza nodded. "They think you're going dark, that you're becoming…"

" _Him_."

"Yes."

I let go of her, she wasn't crying as hard anymore, and I ran my hand through my hair. "Tell me everything you know and then I want you to do something important."

"What's that?"

"You're going to hide in the one place I know you'll be safe."

"The Room of-"

I shook my head. "No, I think you'll find Luna strolling the grounds right now, she'll help."

"Where should I start?"

"At the beginning."

* * *

I walked down the corridors, leading to the Great Hall. My hand ran across the castle wall as I walked, I probably wouldn't see it much again. I didn't know what would happen but I knew it wouldn't be good. Demelza had told me everything as we headed down to where I knew Luna would be. I told Luna what she needed to do and told her that we…that we would be leaving Hogwarts. She smiled at me and asked if we would be flying like the old times, I told her some would yes. Now I was alone, I was tired and alone and ready for what was to come. The doors were open, I walked through and stopped, after a moment or two people started to look up and the murmurs began.

"Have something to say Potter?" I heard someone shout and I nodded. I saw Pansy and Nott and Blaise, the Greengrass sisters, and then I saw Malfoy. He sat at the center of them all with them flanking him, protecting him. He seemed worried.

"I do."

"What about Mr. Potter?" Professor McGonagall questioned, she seemed stiff and rigid, as if she was disturbed by my presence.

I stepped forward. "I know."

"You know what Mr. Potter?" she asked me, looking around as if someone else would give her the answer.

"Next time you want someone to spy on me…" I heard a few gasps and a grunts of anger, Hermione tried to stand but Ron held her down but to no avail. "…make sure they don't have your tattoo."

Hermione stood along with a few others that were scattered about the room. I saw Ginny stand after a second of hesitation, they had their wands drawn, at the ready. The Slytherins were putting their forks down, not sure of what would happen.

"Where is Demelza?"

I shrugged. "I don't know."

"You're lying!" Ginny shouted.

"Am I Ginny?"

Dean stood in the isle between the houses and pointed at me threateningly. "Where is she Potter?"

"No one will harm Draco or any other Slytherin."

"Screw them…where is Demelza?"

I sighed, shrugged, and then glanced around. "What do you do with spies? You kill them."

Hermione shook her head. "No! Damn you Harry! You're choosing the wrong side, he doesn't deserve to be free, and he deserves to be locked away, to be forgotten. None of them deserve to live after what they did, after what they were involved in."

"And yet you tried to kill him. Where's the justice in that? Who ordered you to do that?" I demanded.

No one spoke, it was quiet. Around me the Great Hall was absolutely quiet, everyone looked at everyone and no one took the responsibility. I took my wand out and raised it an inch or two. Hermione and a few others reacted by doing the same.

"I'm waiting…Ron."

I heard a fork being placed on the table, the sound of robes moving, and then a sigh as Ron stood at the center of the walkway between the two tables. His face was scarred and partially deformed from the embers, unable to be fixed in time. He stared at me silently while I watched him.

"I don't care about the why, or when, all I care about is that you betrayed me," I said to him. "You were my brother."

He shook his head. "No Harry you betrayed us by helping that murderer, all of them. We will cleanse this earth of their scum and we will start it here. You were always the cause of our concern, we were frightened of your misguidedness. You even began to care for them instead of hate them."

"I'm sorry…" I said loudly. "…but I couldn't stand by and watch as their lives were ripped apart. And I must tell you I cannot stand by again as their lives are endangered. We will be leaving now."

Ron took his wand out. "I can't let you do that Harry. The Triumphant will return the Wizarding World to its rightful place as a safe haven for purebloods and muggle-borns alike, to all magical folk. If you stand in our way any longer we must deal with you as an enemy of the Triumphant. Alone yes you are stronger but together we will be unstoppable."

"Don't do this Ron, don't try it. I'm stronger than you. I'm taking the Slytherins and leaving, we aren't staying here any longer."

Ron shook his head again and stepped forward. "We do not have to be enemies. Please Harry…I have no wish to kill you. Why do you persist?"

"I made a promise to a girl…" I told him. "…and I intend to keep it."

My heart beat in my chest, I let out a small gasp which Draco caught and turned slightly to look at me. I had tears piercing my eyes for some reason that I couldn't quite understand. I met his eyes and he raised an eyebrow when I reached out for him with trembling hands.

"Are you alright?" he asked me.

I couldn't answer.

"Pansy what's-"

Potter's, no Harry's, voice reached my ears again as he spoke to his once best friend. "I must keep that promise Ron, whatever happens cannot be undone."

"Promises…you made me promises, you made Hermione promises, you made a lot of promises Harry Potter," Ron called out to me, he was toying with me. He stood with his scarred face, his voice raspy and far from what it once was. But there was emotion there, raw and unhindered emotion that had blinded him. His anger and jealousy was overcoming who he once was. His loss and his sadness was too much for him.

"I tried my best Ron," I stood with my shoulders slumped, I was exhausted and I knew exactly how this would end. "I did the best I could, do you think I wanted to watch those people die, to have Him in my head and to hear his thoughts, his wants, and his sick desires? Do you honestly think I want to turn into him?"

"Your best is not good enough Harry!" Hermione shouted from the table. "You let known traitors and villains go by speaking on their behalf. Why do you think we started this organization without you? We are trying to improve the Wizarding World and denounce you as its savior. We followed you blindly, so many died because of you after Dumbledore died, you ran and hid like a child while others were left to fight without their leader. No more Harry, no more will your name ring in a child's ear to make them feel safe."

Neville stood now. "And what about all of those wronged here in Hogwarts? What about the innocent that were affected by the war and you did nothing when it came out that Slytherin students were hurting and torturing others. You stood before witches and wizards and told them they should pardon individuals such as Malfoy, Nott, and Parkinson. Not to mention dozens more. They were our enemy Harry and you betrayed us for them!"

Forks and knives were dropped, I heard Blaise swear and Malfoy laugh lightly, he was impressed. I stared at Harry with a newfound respect. I was touched, deep down and where no one had ever reached, I felt a joy at the sight of Harry as he stood before his former friends and comrades with a look of complete defiance. But it wasn't just that, he stood calm with his eyes front and never denied a thing. I gripped Draco's hand tighter and he turned once again to look at me.

"What is it?"

"Will he be alright?"

Draco smiled knowingly. "Of course, he has us."

"I never betrayed you. I did what I felt was right, for the greater good. They were children, teenagers who never got to live a true childhood…just like me."

"Regardless of your intent…" Ron started again. "…they are criminals and will be handled as such."

I stepped forward, my wand in my hand now. "No one will hurt them or you will answer to me."

"Stop this foolishness Harry and join us," Hermione offered as she walked towards Ron.

"I will not stand for something I think is corrupt. You have forgotten what it means to do good…you join each other out of fear while I look to forgiveness and faith in all of us that we will be stronger together. If you do not feel the same then we will take absence of you. Draco…" I called out to my friend. "…gather yourselves, we will be leaving."

Ron raised his wand, spit flung from his mouth as he hissed his words. "No one will be leaving anywhere."

"Don't try it Ron, you are no match for me!" I said through gritted teeth. I felt my anger flare and my hand twitched, I was controlling myself but just barely, it was becoming very hard to do so. "None of you are."

Hermione had 'tears' in her eyes. "You were like a brother to me Harry, but now you betray us completely."

"Draco let's go."

I backed away towards the door as the first few Slytherins made their out of the Great Hall very carefully, still unsure of what was happening. Draco stood with Blaise and Pansy while Theodore Nott and Daphne Greengrass herded them out to the grounds, Demelza and Luna were making sure of that. Ron stared at us enraged and stepped forward, his voice booming.

"Do not go any farther or the Triumphant will stop you all!"

I saw Draco try to raise his wand but Blaise stopped him, he whispered in his ear and Malfoy nodded. He and the remaining Slytherins, there had really only been about twenty to return to Hogwarts, came towards me, behind me. But as Pansy began to walk I saw Hermione raise her wand in a quick motion intending to hex her but I was quicker and I shouted, my spell speeding towards Hermione, no one was able to react in time and she was hit in the stomach. I watched as her body was picked up and thrown across the Great Hall, she collided with the professors' table and crumbled to the ground while several other Triumphant members rose in defense of her. Ron yelled in anger. I stood, I had chosen my path.

"Traitor!"

I blocked a spell he sent my way and then blocked another, spinning to my left a red spell smashed into the ground and made an indent two feet deep. I blocked one more before I took my chance and sent out a powerful bone crusher spell, Ron saw it coming and had no chance to dodge and instead he dragged up a student from the table and flung him forward. The spell collided with the fifth year and he yelped as he fell, his ribs all but dust. The students not a part of the Triumphant ran for the edges of the room while Ron and his followers remained, a good twenty or so students and most of them were in the DA. Most of the Professors came down to stand with them, and I silently wondered how much power Ron had in this organization.

"You've chosen wrongly Potter."

I shook my head. "On the contrary...I didn't chose anything, I'm keeping my promise."

He defended me. Granger was going to hex me, curse me even, and I saw it in her eyes. She could have killed me. Harry…Harry saved me again. He defended me against his former best friend, the girl he fought beside for how many years? I wasn't a fighter but for as long as he stood with us then I would stand with him. I drew my wand and was the first one beside him, standing just to the left of him while Draco came up on his right.

"We will not surrender…" Harry told them, his voice echoed across the hall. "…I will defend them."

For some reason I reached out and took his left hand, I felt him flinch at my touch before he closed his hand around mine and held it tight. I smiled inwardly before raising my wand along with the others, ready to fight.

"Then it will be your downfall."

I shrugged. "I never cared for my fame anyway."

Ron shook his head, looked at me one final time and then all at once the Triumphant fired at us with a spell I have never seen before. It intertwined into one single blast that shot forward through the Great Hall, my new friends gasped and backed away but I would not be daunted. Letting go over Pansy's hand I took a few steps forward and, going purely on faith in my ability, I did what my heart was telling me. Leaping from my wand was my silver stag, it galloped forwards, growing in size with each step it took until it leapt at the yellow spell and took it head on, a massive explosion filled the Great Hall and the tables were blasted aside, the students hugging the walls dropped to the ground to take cover from the shards of wood while the windows shattered and the Triumphant were thrown into each other, falling and crumbling under the impact. I yelled in anger when I saw Ron still standing, a shield glowing around him before he shrugged off the blow.

"I am now stronger than you Harry," he told me quietly, walking forward. "The time of the Chosen one is over, the Triumphant will seize our justice."

"We shall see…" I breathed, that spell exhausted me. I glanced behind me at Draco and gestured to the door. "…Go Malfoy, onto the grounds, you'll know where to go."

While Ron continued forward Draco shook his head. "I'll stay with you, Potter."

"Malfoy go!" I shouted as the Triumphant were rising and charging forward. The Slytherins were glancing at each other unsure, I had just saved them again, but they didn't know if they should stay and fight beside me. I took Malfoy by the collar, Ginny was only twenty yards away yet they weren't firing spells yet, and pushed him backwards. "Get them out Malfoy, get them safe. Go!"

I turned away from them, feeling my magic coursing through my veins. One by one the Slytherins left, Draco and Pansy were the last ones; they were going to stay. Both of them nodded to the other and moved forward to stand beside me but I knew it would not go well for them, they weren't strong enough. Without the use of my wand I pushed them backwards through the doorway, Pansy and Malfoy shouting for me to stop. I glanced backwards with a brief smile.

"Go!" I yelled and then met Ginny head on. I blocked her first attack and then blocked one from Neville, I sent a leg locker to Ginny and caught her just below her knees, she fell to the ground but could still fight so I fired off a stunner and she slid across the ground unconscious. I met Neville next and fired off two stunners one directly after the other, he managed to block them both but he didn't see the third, it hit him fully in the face and he flipped over himself and onto an overturned table, his wand snapped beneath him. I met several more as the minutes wore on. My magic sustained me and eventually I was dodging and blocking and attacking as many as ten at a time. Sweat beaded down my brow and I was occasionally hit with a cutting curse or a bone breaker but nothing too serious, I fought on. I only hoped I was giving them enough time.

"Where are we going?" I yelled as I helped Draco down the steps and into the cold night. We rushed across the grounds as fast as we could but had no idea where we were going until we saw a light coming towards us. Behind us, in the castle, we could hear the fighting and I begged merlin that Harry would be okay.

"Malfoy, Parkinson, this way!" Demelza shouted as she came upon us. I couldn't believe it.

"You betrayed Harry, why should we trust you?" Malfoy asked, grabbing her by her collar.

She blanched white but stood her ground. "I have to repay him for his forgiveness, I owe him. Follow me and you will get out of here."

I made a decision to trust her. "Draco let her go, Demelza let's go."

I was forced back into the corridor, but not before taking a few of the Triumphant down, as the battle wore on and they began to make up ground I was forced to use spells I had never thought I'd use against friends. Instead of stunners I sent out bone crushers and cutting curses, spells they were using only stronger and darker. Dean tried to flank me but I ducked, rolled and fired off a cutting curse aimed for his hand. He yelled and fell to the ground with his hand hanging limply. Seamus shouted in rage, dropping his wand and rushing me. I took my chance and fired directly at his chest with a bone crusher. He stared blankly as his body was flung back into one of the professors.

"You are killing Harry, you are murdering!" Ron called from behind the group.

I ignored him and knew it was time to leave. I fired a few spells at the ceiling and it began to crumble, falling atop us. Without waiting another second I fired one more at the group before rushing out of the door and down through the grounds with the group following behind.

I saw my friends huddled at the point I had informed Demelza to wait, the secret I had woven into the Hogwarts wards at the behest of Dumbledore's portrait. It was one of two places a person could leave the grounds by portkey, while I had gone to the Great Hall I had Demelza and Luna make as many portkeys as possible.

"Harry!" I heard Pansy yelled and a spell flew from her wand, I dived down behind a boulder, the next moment Zacharias Smith was knocked unconscious.

"Thank you," I told her and got up. "Who's left?"

Demelza gestured to the group around me. Draco, Pansy, Demelza and myself. I nodded and then was about to speak when a spell collided with Demelza, she hit the ground hard and the portkey in her hand, there was only one left, fell to the snow. Malfoy shouted and grabbed her leg before diving for the portkey with me and Pansy reaching for it but we just missed it as Demelza and Malfoy were transported away.

"Pan-" Malfoy began but never finished.

Pansy looked to me and I grabbed her hand. "What now Harry?"

"Give up Harry!" Ron shouted, he was close.

I smiled at her, reassuringly. "It'll be okay."

"Harry!" Ron bellowed as he came closer.

"Kreacher!"

The elf appeared and bowed to me. "Master?"

Ron came running forwards with his wand raised, a spell on his lips.

"Kreacher take her to the island, I'll protect you!"

Pansy shook her head, tears streaming down her face. "No Har-"

I was alone.

Ron fired his spell and I only just managed to avoid it by diving to the left and I fell down towards the Lake. He fired another as I tried to stand and I felt a pain in my leg from the spell but I ignored it for now. Standing up I saw Kreacher return and reach out for me just as Ron was going to fire. But I beat him too it and yelled off a spell I never wanted to use.

The green spell left my wand and flew towards Ron…and then Kreacher brought us away from there.

I felt sand beneath me. Before I passed out I raised my head, I saw Pansy sitting beside me with tears in her eyes; I saw a bright sun and blue waves. We were safe.


	2. Adapting to Decisions Made

I didn't sleep that night. I walked through the halls, clearing up where I could, fixing things when I found something broken. Others celebrated and cheered, the dead were transported to a large barren field on the other side of the lake, buried in individual graves in neat rows and columns. I didn't help, didn't have too, it wasn't personal, it wasn't emotional. Since the wards were down people came flooding in, mediwitches and wizards, the press, all sorts of family members and such. I watched from a broken window high in the sky as great roaring fires were lit with broken furniture and well…anything that would burn. Oh and the Death Eater bodies…imagine what those fires were for. I spotted Ron and Neville toss bodies; toss them like they were filth. Death Eaters were evil yes but something about how they did it didn't seem right to me, it felt as if they were enjoying it.

"…Harry?" a timid voice called out from behind me.

I was jolted awake when I heard a clap of thunder and a rain drop on my forehead. I looked around and saw I was laying on a long beach with the waves gently washing up onto the sand, the sky was dark and brooding while the rain began to fall. To my left was the frame of Pansy Parkinson, she was wrapped in my robes and had the hood up to cover her head from the falling rain, behind her I saw blond hair and assumed it was Draco.

"You're awake," Pansy said to me as I sat up.

I nodded and ran a hand through my hair, I felt dried blood on my scalp. "What happened?"

"You were a bloody idiot that's what happened!" Draco snapped as he approached, behind him I saw a few others, one of which was Demelza who avoided my gaze and instead hung back with Luna. Draco looked tired and thin, still not fully healed from his near death encounter but fit enough to shout at me…some things never change. "You could have died Potter."

"I made a-"

What words I was attempting to say left my mind as I felt a pain in my ribs and fell sideways into Pansy's lap, she wrapped her arms around my shoulders as I groaned in agony. Draco kneeled down beside me and put a hand on my arm to help steady me.

"You'll be alright Potter, we will heal you up," he said to me. "We need to get out of the rain though, can you lead us to whatever it was you were looking for here."

"Kreacher…" I muttered and heard no more.

Once again I found myself waking in an unfamiliar environment, however this one was much better than the last. Reaching for my glasses to the left of me I felt silk sheets beneath me and a gentle breeze through a window across from me. I smelt rain and a sea-breeze and knew I was still on the island…then I remembered they must have found the small island cottage that my family had here, it was up on a field overlooking the sea. I placed my feet on the cold hardwood floors and reached for the sweater that had been folded and placed beneath my glasses. As I went to put it on I felt a slight pain and looked down, my chest was nearly engulfed in bandages and what skin wasn't hidden by the white bandages were bruised black and blue and deep purple. It took two tries to pull the sweater on but when I did I felt okay enough to move my arms around and see how much pain it would cause me. After a moment I felt good enough to stand and try for the door across the room.

"Easy there Potter," I heard Draco before I saw him. Looking around I saw he had been seated in a wicker arm chair in the corner, nursing a small drink and reading from a book. His face looked even more exhausted than previously and he sat slumped but relaxed.

"Draco…" I called out to him and started to walk towards him. "…are we at the cottage?"

"Yes, your house elf was more than helpful but what he wasn't helpful in was helping transport you here. I had to carry you, you're heavier than you look."

I scratched at a bandage on my neck. "Why didn't you use magic to bring me here?"

"Our wands don't work here for some reason."

"Same as in the small manor in Scotland remember?" I asked him to which he nodded.

He drank the rest of his drink and placed the glass on a matching wicker table. "Maybe a safety precaution or something."

"Possibly…how are you here anyway?"

Draco stood and walked towards the door, opening it and then gesturing for me to follow. The two of us set off and from what I could see this cottage was much bigger than what I was expecting, but it was cozy and relaxing. I heard voices coming from down a flight of stairs, Draco helped me down them as apparently my ankle had been shattered by a spell but Kreacher had mended it, though I still felt how weak it was. Once we descended into the small study I saw a fire roaring in the brick fireplace, I felt a wave of warmth and my tired arms and legs felt a bit better, if not better but relaxed. On a plump couch next to the fireplace Luna was napping under a thin blanket and I saw a Tracey Davis in a chair reading a large book, she looked up at me but said nothing.

"In here Harry," Draco told me and walked me into a kitchen where a few people were going through some food and asking what they should make. I saw Blaise sitting in a chair at the table drinking straight from a bottle of wine while Daphne and Astoria Greengrass were discussing how to make a muggle dish they once had but couldn't remember the name too, Pansy stood by the oven and stared at it as she tried to understand its purpose. And then I saw Demelza who was smiling and trying to explain the oven.

"Harry!" Blaise called out as he noticed me.

I saw Pansy turn around quickly and then I saw Demelza back up slightly but only so much that I noticed, or so I thought. Daphne smiled at me as did the younger Astoria but she returned to looking through a book I saw to be a cook book.

"Good to see you on your feet," Blaise said and took a sip of his wine…well technically it was my wine but who really cared at this point. I nodded at him and he returned to focusing on the wine, ignoring the fact I was even there.

"How are you feeling?" Pansy asked me.

I felt uneasy being in a room with everyone, they all stared at me and waited for me to say something, my heart beat as my words were lost. Draco put a hand on my shoulder, gestured to a stool, and walked into the room. He looked at the cook book Astoria was reading and took it from her.

"He's fine folks…" turned to me and handed the cook book off to my hands. "…do you know what kind of food they're trying but failing to make?"

I laughed and looked at the ingredients on the kitchen island; I saw a selection of pasta and some herbs with meat and a bunch of random tomatoes. I put the book down and nodded. It was obvious that they were trying to make spaghetti, though it isn't really an island dish if you know what I mean.

"Spaghetti and meatballs I'd say."

Astoria smacked her sister on the arm. "I told you it started with an S."

"Oh shut up…" Daphne stated and swiped the cook book. "…let's get to work then I'm hungry."

The next hour was a whirlwind of movement and arguing…mainly by the Greengrass girls…as they worked to make a substantial dinner for everyone. I sat at the island and gave some pointers here-and-there but largely remained quiet while Draco sat beside me with a bottle of an ancient looking wine that he had found in the cellar, we all shared it except for Blaise who had drank two bottles and was now passed out on a couch in the study…his way of coping I guess. Pansy kept glancing at me and I at her as the time wore on and I wished for our own time alone once again. No one talked about what happened and no one brought up the school or going back or what to do now. I think we were all trying to just get through one day without it nagging at our minds. Demelza had retreated into the study and was now talking with Tracey Davis and Luna as they explored the bookshelves.

We ate in the kitchen, the food wasn't the greatest but it was their first time cooking muggle style and it would have done alright for my aunt and uncle I'd say. I sat beside Pansy and Luna, who ate the spaghetti with chopsticks she had randomly found from somewhere in the kitchen, we all got a nice laugh as she explained the story of why she ate spaghetti like that and at the end I found myself glad she was here. Draco had found extra seats in the cellar and a table leaf, which he only understood what it was until after I spent ten minutes explaining it. After the spaghetti was gone, due to our extreme appetites, the sun had set and the storm was now raging against the house. A few more drinks were drank and then we asked Kreacher to make some deserts, while we waited Blaise spoke up.

"Can…uh can I say a few words?" he asked the group and most of us nodded while a few just stared at him until he spoke. Blaise took a sip of his drink and he stood up which got a laugh from Draco.

"Bloody hell mate are you going to give a speech?" Draco laughed, leaning back in his chair, his cheeks rosy but you could still see the paleness of his skin. He wore a loose fitting t-shirt that he had found upstairs and it was much too large for him.

"Oi shut it or I'm sitting down!" he snapped back, cheeks red. He went to sit back down but Astoria, who sat beside him, smacked his arm and gestured for him to stay standing which he did after a moment. He cleared his throat and then glanced at me, reaching down he picked up his glass and raised it in the air. "…Thank you Harry Potter, without you I doubt very much I would have seen out the next year and now I say I have more of a chance than ever. Thank you for saving me and my friends and…apparently…for keeping us out of hell on earth. I'm in your debt."

"To Harry," they said in unison.

"You don't have to thank me…it was the right thing to do."

Pansy smiled at me. "But you didn't have to do it."

I sat in silence as they drank after Blaise's toast, he sat back down and Kreacher served the sweats. As they night wore on the mood began to drown itself as we steadily lost our battle with exhaustion. I hadn't had the opportunity to explore the cottage yet but from what they had told me there were enough rooms to sleep comfortably in. Blaise stated his intention to sleep in the study, asking me for another bottle of wine which I shrugged towards and he thanked me happily but Daphne had stepped in and told him enough was enough. He nodded to her and was led into the study and then put to bed by the quiet command of Daphne while Luna told the group she, Demelza and Astoria were going to take over the large guest bedroom on the ground floor. I saw them take an assortment of sweats and books with them. Tracey headed for a shower and that left Pansy, Draco and I in the kitchen although Pansy soon left for a shower as well.

I felt an amount of sadness as I had watched Demelza in the coming days. She hadn't spoken to me once and I couldn't blame her for that, I had noticed bruises on her neck and arms and figured that was my doing. She stayed close to Luna and Astoria. I missed talking with her, granted it had only been hours since our escape but I found her lack of companionship disheartening. Demelza was a different story. She never spoke to me, only when she had too and that wasn't often. As the days went on Astoria welcomed her into her and Daphne's sisterhood it seemed because they became inseparable as the days wore on. I found myself waiting for any sign of her and I tried to speak to her numerous times but nothing came out of my mouth when I had the chance.

In the days that followed we began to settle into the island and it became the closest thing to home we had all had in a while. While a friendship was strong between the former snakes already their bonds seemingly intensified with the inclusion of Luna, Demelza and myself, though I kept to myself more so than anyone. Without the tradition separation of houses blocking our ability to talk Draco and I became just as close as we had been in the time after the war when he was a guest in my house, we rose early as we once had and ate breakfast with a calm breeze through the windows; I enjoyed having his company once again and discovered just how much I missed his lengthy talks about random topics that usually had no meaning. I found myself becoming a teacher of sorts as I explained various muggle things to the former snakes and some to Luna as well, such as the toaster which after Blaise had set fire to on two separate occasions I was forced to put the toaster on a high shelf to hide from the pureblood. Daphne and Astoria had become the chefs, though I had insisted on helping them and teaching them my knowledge as I always thought I was pretty good.

I watched the group from afar numerous times, taking mental notes of their likes and dislikes and dreams and nightmares when they talked to each other or when they told the group something they had thought of. I studied Daphne and Tracey, even Blaise; Daphne was calculating and cold but warm on the inside and friendly while Tracey was simple and intelligent with a relaxed exterior, she was always reading and reading muggle novels too. Blaise was a drinker, whether he enjoyed it or relied on it I didn't really know, what I did know was he liked muggle television and liked to talk about how he wanted to propose to a girl in Italy he had met while on the run; I pitied him. Draco and Astoria seemed to spend a lot of time together and after a few conversations with Daphne that had given me the knowledge they were to marry due to a marriage contract, while I wasn't one to agree with marriage contracts I could tell there was a genuine affection between the two. Luna liked to wonder the island and enjoyed walks on the beach, I would accompany her on many trips and sometimes we were gone for hours, I felt secure with her and Luna would talk to me about how she was proud of what I did…usually though she was typical Luna, always bringing a smile to my face. She liked to talk with Daphne and the two sparked a unique friendship that I stayed away from in respect to Luna.

Pansy. She had struggled at first, in the first week or two, to settle in but after a while she got used to the temporary new life. Away from school I learned how she really was and I enjoyed her friendship, always hoping for more but never seeing it. We spent nearly all day together, while it was sitting in the study reading, me healing from my battle mostly, or sitting in the sand under a palm tree. She spoke often about her family and how she had been ashamed of them and how Draco had been her only real support for a long time. She feared the coming days and feared the Triumphant, she feared her friends dying, and she feared me dying. I listened and hardly talked. I don't think she minded that too much. The two of us became close and when we were together the others stayed away.

One such time was when we were walking the beach near enough to midnight I'd say, the night was clear and bright as the moon reflected light off the waves and it was calming as we looked up to the hill where the cottage sat, just before the plain where a row of coconut trees stood tall and provided an exotic sustenance they hadn't had before. We had tasked Kreacher with getting clothes suitable for the warmer weather and he had succeeded brilliantly, almost too brilliantly as he came back with nearly twenty bags of clothing for each of us. Pansy was wearing a pair of khaki shorts with a loose fitting tank top over a green bikini top while I wore shorts and a plain t-shirt.

"Had you ever gone on vacation?" she asked me as a silence had overcome us for the last few minutes. I shook my head at her question which made her prod the subject a bit more. "What? You've never gone on a vacation before?"

"Uh…I went to the zoo once," I said, the memory flooding back into my mind.

"Did you like it?" she asked, side-stepping a washed up log. I shrugged to her question with a slight laugh coming out of my mouth before I could help it.

"I talked to a snake and set him loose, then trapped my cousin behind glass…" I smiled briefly. "…it was alright I guess."

"You're a wonder Potter," she told me, giving me a sideways glance. I gazed at her in silence and offered a small grin to which she returned. Pansy wrapped her arms around her waist, hugging herself, as she walked. As the minutes went on I found it increasingly annoying that we eventually had to return to the house instead of staying by the shore and after a while she yawned. "I think…" she looked at me. "…we should head back, it's late."

"Yeah…" I replied, stopping at a barren stretch of sand and looked out over the water. Pansy stood a few feet away from me, she gazed at me for several moments as I remained quiet. Eventually she went to leave but then turned back and walked up beside me. She took my hand in hers and placed her right hand on my cheek and turned my face to hers.

"What goes on in your head?" She rubbed my cheek softly and I looked down. "Why are you always so quiet Harry, we are safe here, we can remain here."

I shook my head, looking down. "I can't hide here for the rest of my life."

"Why not? It is yours…we are all happy here, once we figure out how to use our wands here we can make more cottages and remain indefinitely, I know for a fact everyone enjoys it here."

"I don't want any of you to live in fear," I told her.

Pansy smiled. "That's sweet Harry but we aren't your responsibility."

"I spoke on your behalf, I made the decisions that put this…all of this into motion."

She furled her brow in confusion. "Harry you made friends with us, you're family now, you did more than anyone could ever hope for by standing by us. You have nothing more to prove. What's keeping you from being happy here with us…" Pansy rubbed my cheek again and smiled sadly. "…with me?"

"You're here because of me, I need to make it right. I'm going to make it right Pansy, I promise."

"And then what?" she asked, letting go of my hand and letting her hand drop from my cheek. I wanted to grab her hands and hold her tight, to bring her close to me but I couldn't find the strength, I couldn't take that step yet, it was too dangerous.

"I don't know Pansy," I said quietly and turned towards the sea. I walked towards the waves and slid my hands into the pockets of my shorts, letting out a breath and hiding the tears from my eyes. She left soon after and I was alone, I stood there for several hours just looking out over the dark waves, just looking. Draco tried to bring me inside but I shook my head and told him I couldn't, he understood and so he stayed with me for a few minutes before he yawned and I told him to go to bed, he wanted to stay but I told him I was fine. He knew I wasn't and I knew I wasn't but he left.

Christmas Eve was fast approaching and we had spent the better part of two months in hiding on the island. While we hid my obsession that had once consumed me back at school was beginning to take hold once again. I hardly ate, I hardly talked. I would stand by the waves and go over everything that I knew, I would recite it over and over again; I would write in the sand and then let the waves wash it away when someone came to fetch me. I noticed they talked to me less, they avoided me while I watched them, I knew they didn't see my stares nor did they suspect anything. I saw how Pansy became closer with Demelza, the latter of which spent a lot of time talking and interacting with the group. I found it odd but ignored my suspicions due to the fact she was probably trying to make amends. Draco and Blaise fished daily, I would join them sometimes while other times I wandered the island.

After a while I decided I needed to return to England in order to find out more, I needed information and so I sought it out. I would leave for hours, I would call Kreacher and we would return to England and investigate the Triumphant. I would conceal my face with magic and walk the streets of Diagon Alley, talking to people and watching. I spotted a few people, it seemed graduation had come early, I saw Ginny and Dean, it seemed my fight with them had been devastating as he did indeed lose his hand and Ginny walked with a limp, I held morbid glee in this fact and laughed when I saw her. I read newspapers and discovered I had killed Seamus, crushed his ribs into dust along with his spine and heart with the bone crusher. I found no word on Ron and it was gnawing at my mind, I visited as many graveyards as I could and read any newspaper I could find. I went to his home, I blew through the doors when no one was home and went through it all but it was abandoned, they had left without a clue as to where. I watched as Kreacher and I burned their house down, my eyes burning with rage. I went to find Luna's father and he was pleased to see me but I told him to run and so he did. I helped him get away and then I decided I needed information only a Triumphant could give me but first I went to search for my friends' families, to find any type of good news but I found none. Blaise's mother was dead, Daphne and Astoria's parents burned with their manor, Tracey's parents were found in the muggle world, I almost saved them but I was too late and buried them in the field behind their house, near a rose garden, I hoped they would have liked that. Finally when I knew I needed more information I told Kreacher to find Ginny and then we acted.

It was a dark night as she was taking a drink at the Hog's Head, I waited in the shadows until she stepped into the street; I followed her to the edge of the city and then attacked. I knocked her unconscious and dragged her to the cave Sirius had once lived within. When she woke she saw me and screamed for help but her voice was muffled by a spell, tears began to fall when I demanded information she couldn't give me. When she wasn't helping I forced her to drink truth serum but it did no good either. She hadn't seen Ron in the weeks that had followed and I demanded to know if he had died but she had no knowledge and that frightened me so. Where was he? When I was done with her I wiped her memory and had Kreacher deposit her body somewhere in Africa, in the Sahara I told him. I went for Hermione next but found nothing on her and it drove me mad, I went to her house and tore through it for any clues, there was nothing. I thought of her parents in Australia but again found nothing, they were still living the false life they thought was real. After my return from Australia in London I realized it was nearly a week since I had gone and knew I was to return soon. I bought a few packages and presents for the others, not to lessen the wrath for leaving but to make life normal once more. My mission was a failure and I learned nothing new about the Triumphant.

She slapped me.

"Do you have any idea how worried I have been?" she screamed at me as the others watched from the study, Blaise and Draco walking in from the kitchen and Luna coming down the stairs. Pansy's face was red and tears fell down her face. I stood at the door, looking straight at her, and waiting for the rest of the shouts and yells. She slapped me again when I stayed quiet. Pansy glared at me and I felt another strike hit my face, this third slap knocked my glasses to the floor and one of the lenses shattered. Draco walked forward and pulled her away just as a fourth slap met my cheek. "I thought you got taken somehow!

"Nice of you to join us Potter…" Daphne snapped from a chair, she took in my appearance and raised an eyebrow. "…you look horrendous by the way."

"Would you care to explain to us where in the hell you've been?" Blaise asked as Draco held Pansy's arms. I was surprised to see how much he was worried.

Before I could say anything I heard Demelza speak. I turned to look at her, as did the rest of us. She was sitting beside Astoria, they look to have been making Christmas decorations of some kind.

"Isn't it obvious…he was investigating the Triumphant, weren't you?"

I felt the gazes of them all on me as I closed the door and walked into the study. I sat on a couch beside Luna and nodded. I could feel Pansy's glare as she was pushed into a seat by Draco, who then sat beside her. The others came around and stared at me expectantly but I felt as though I had no need to tell them anything so I remained quiet.

"We are waiting for an explanation Potter," Blaise said after a few minutes.

"You know we have been getting the newspapers here right? They've started flooding in from all over, I managed to figure out how to get them here without giving our position away to anybody, and we've been reading about strange occurrences and even a few disappearances." Draco stated for the group and then he went on. "Your old friend Ginevra went missing, she was found in Africa yesterday, well some of her anyway."

"I know," I told them.

"What gives you the right to leave and not include us in this?"

I glanced at Pansy but I couldn't hold the gaze. "Because it doesn't have anything to do with you. I'm not looking for a way to stop them, I'm not trying to get us back there, what I'm trying to do is find him."

"Him?"

Demelza glanced at Astoria. "I'm sure he means Ron."

"Why are you looking for him?" Daphne asked from her chair, she had a genuinely curious look on her face and I hated how Demelza had all the answers. I made a face and tried to walk away but Pansy jumped from her chair and came at me with an enraged glare on her face, without wanting to further anger her I sat back and grimaced at the situation. "You can tell us Potter."

"…I tried to kill him."

Draco shrugged. "It was you against how many bloody people Harry? We don't blame you for trying to hurt him."

"No…" I said loudly, my voice growing low. "…I wanted to see him dead. I used the spell we all know we never want to use. I used it willingly. I wanted to see him die by my hand. I've been searching for him because I want to kill him."

No one spoke and no one seemed able to look away from me. They took in my appearance, I knew I looked worse than I had in a while. My clothes hung loose and my hair was untamed and too long, my chin and cheeks were covered in an unshaven beard while my eyes were tired and bloodshot and angry. My hands were dirty and my clothes were wrinkled, my stomach was hungry and it growled but I remained still.

"He would have murdered all of us," Draco finally said as he put a hand on Pansy's shoulder, keeping her from standing. "What you did for me…what you did for all of us is something we cannot repay you nor will we ever. You would have killed for us."

"It's okay Harry," Astoria piped up from beside Demelza.

"Yeah mate we are here for you," Blaise stated with a lopsided grin.

I shook my head and stood, going to walk out when Pansy stood up now and shouted after me to come back, Draco held her back and asked me to return but my exhaustion was too much and I turned on them. I pointed at them with spit flying from my mouth and angry tears falling from my eyes. My anger lashed out and I saw as some books flew from the shelves and hit the opposing wall, everyone sat up in their chairs or gasped at the sudden magic.

"You don't get it do you? They aren't the enemy for me like they were for you all so long. They were my family, the only ones who gave a bloody damn about who I was beneath the scar. Each one of them betrayed me, they were there for me when no one else were. They tried to hurt the two people I had come to love and they did it without hesitation, without remorse. That was unforgivable. I killed Ginny, I tortured her mind for answers I never found! I did that. I watched…" my voice rising to new heights. "…as she cried and begged me to stop but I didn't! I did that! I could have killed Demelza when I found out she betrayed me, she spied on me! I almost killed her, don't you people understand? I'm not a hero you should be thanking. I didn't fight for you, I fought them because I wanted them to pay for what they did to me. I wanted them to bleed."

Pansy was crying, Luna watched me curiously while Demelza turned away from me. Blaise stood beside Draco, watching him not me and Daphne just stared, an icy expression back in place. Outside a blast of thunder jolted us into movement again but was only temporary, I stepped back and leaned against the wall. I slid down to the floor and tossed my wand away, it rolled across the room and stopped against the fireplace.

"Harry…" Draco began but was unable to finish and so he walked over to my wand and picked it up from the ground, he wiped it off and placed it on the mantle. Turning to look at the group he sighed and came towards me. "…Harry get up mate, it'll be okay. You were there for us no matter what you wanted, you fought for us regardless of your inspiration and you bled for us, your old enemies. You have been fighting for so long you forgot what it feels like to stop and live. Let us help you now."

Before I or anyone else could say anything Kreacher appeared with the wrapped gifts. Everyone turned to him with confusion and when he glared back he tossed the gifts one by one to who they belonged and then nodded at me, he made his way into the cellar where he had made a small nest similar to the old one he once had. Everyone looked down at the gifts of various size and weight with even more confusion than before.

"Did you buy us gifts?" Blaise asked loudly as the rest of them started to fiddle around with the gift warp and bows. Draco eyed his small gift with a determined expression, as if he was trying to guess what was in it.

I nodded after a moment, running a hand through my hair as I spoke.

"Yeah."

"Wicked mate, you're forgiven," he then began to tear into the wrapped present as we watched.

It was a quiet affair for the rest of the evening with the gifts being enjoyed. Blaise had nearly kissed me when he saw the gift, it was a replenishing flask that would fill with whatever drink, alcoholic or not, the owner wanted. I had filled it with his favorite whiskey already. He was sitting by the fire watching the muggle movie I had bought for Daphne, she was beside him and snacking on a plate of cookies Kreacher had baked for everyone. I was in the kitchen cooking dinner with Draco sitting on the counter trying to figure out what it was I had got him. Pansy had retreated to the back porch with Demelza and the two were talking, Astoria and Luna had disappeared upstairs somewhere.

"Potter, are you completely-"

"Malfoy for the love of Merlin shut up!" I laughed as he began the same question for a fourth time. I finished preparing the fish Blaise had caught earlier and moved on to another part of the dish after placing them on the pan to cook. "It's called a mind puzzle for a reason. It isn't supposed to be easy."

Draco shrugged and after a moment he put the puzzle down on the counter, I pretended not to notice him looking around for anyone else.

"You know we have to talk about what happened in there."

I nodded. "I know but we don't need to now."

Draco stared at me. "Harry you can't run off like that, we need you."

I ignored him and worked on the fish. I flipped one of the fish steaks over and sprinkled some salt on it while he talked. The quiet sizzling of the meat mixed with the fresh aroma calmed me but I knew it wasn't for long. And I was right because a moment later Pansy and Demelza walked inside the kitchen and stopped beside us. Demelza appeared to be crying earlier as her eyes were streaked with makeup and tears. Pansy stared at me, she was quiet and timid.

"We uh we need to talk…" Pansy crossed her arms over her chest and her hair fell over her eyes, hiding that which I loved to gaze upon. We had grown apart as I steadily made trips to and from the island, I talked less and less and she seemed to like talking to me less and less too. Just as I had lost Demelza as a friend I was now losing the future I wanted. "…I think everyone needs to hear this."

Draco called them in. I stood next to the oven, watching her as they piled in. I knew what she was going to say and I knew what they would say, I knew what would happen and I hated to think of what might come of it. I stood silent as they began to speak. My heart dropped when Pansy explained how she and Demelza had been talking about the Triumphant and how they think a plan could be made to take back Hogwarts, how they can gain allies. Blaise was overjoyed to hear about fighting, saying he needs to redeem himself. I could tell him he has no need, I could say how he's a decent man how he is. Daphne and Astoria agreed, saying family contacts in France and Spain could lend aid, how they've been missing home. Draco watches me as Pansy speaks, he takes the pan off the stove when the fish begins to burn. Demelza speaks too, saying how she wants to help make things right, to prove to me and to everyone she can be trusted. I could say how I am sorry, how I was wrong, but I watch Pansy and see how she avoids my eyes. I can say how dangerous it would be how Luna's father is gone, how he's hiding in Iceland. I could say how I visited him and he told me how far the Triumphant have spread. But I watch Pansy and my heart drops when she turns to me and says…

"I'm leaving."

I shake my head.

"You can't stop me," Pansy says to me and the rest turn to look at me. She is trying to defy me, trying to look tough, to be brave. I have neglected her, I have abandoned her just as I had wronged the others. She stares at me without the passion that was once there, all I see is anger. I lost her.

"You can't leave," is what I say.

Pansy shrugs. "I can do whatever I like."

"Please…" I beg her and the others glance at each other but I can't see them, it's just me and Pansy, just the two of us. She sheds a tear as I say it again but she wipes it away fast and silent. I take a step forward and raise my hand to touch her cheek but she steps away. "…Pansy please."

"I can't stay any longer."

My hand drops to my side.

"Harry, mate, you aren't coming?"

I turn to Blaise and speak after he stares back. "You underestimate them, you can't stop them at Hogwarts. You can't just jump to a conclusion and say we can take Hogwarts. Oh you have a family that can help, that won't help you against them, they use dark magic and light magic intertwined together. They're mad and vengeful, they want your heads on spikes. They are fueled by rage…you really think that will help you?"

"We can try."

I glance at Daphne and shake my head. "No, no you really can't."

"We can do this without you if that's how it has to be," Pansy snapped, stepping forward. She was breathing heavily and her fists clenched. "All this talk about wanting them to pay, everything you said to us today, the coming and going at odd hours to investigate them, all of it Potter, what was it for? What is the point in searching for them if you won't do anything about it? We want to fight, we want to help save what families we have left. I would think you know the pain of losing family so I just thought you would want to spare us from that."

I laughed despite the situation and then laughed harder when the others looked down. "Pansy…my real family was murdered before I could even remember their faces, I know what it feels like to have no family, no friends, for years." I spat the last word as a challenge to the others. "I know what it's like to be a famous wizard but have no family, to be hated by a group of people for surviving. To be bullied by my cousin daily, to have to live in a broom cupboard while other kids had large beds. I know what it feels like to lose every connection to his parents one after another, I lost my best friends and lost new ones. I died for the wizarding world Pansy, died for it. I fought off a madman for seven years of my life for you and them and the world because I was chosen. I know what it's like to have no childhood and how it feels to have to come to terms with the idea you may not live past seventeen. I know what it is like to live a life not worth living!"

My voice had risen to new heights as I shouted at her, I walked towards her and screamed as loud as I could. She backed away from me, she wasn't looking for a fight but she found one. Demelza backed away as well, she had already been on the end of my rage and she had no wants to be there again. The others watched as I screamed and had nothing to say. My chest was rising and falling as my heart beat, I felt sweat bead down my brow and I felt a rage rising beneath my skin, I felt it prickling at my mind and it was intoxicating, I was blinded by rage and didn't see when she started crying, nor did I see when Draco approach.

"Harry that's enough mate!" he said to me and put a hand on my shoulder but I wanted nothing of it and I pushed him back towards the kitchen island. He hit it hard and that's when Blaise approached, ready for a fight.

"All of you think you know it all but you don't. You're going to die with a moronic plan like that. There's nothing left of your families! They're all dead!" I shouted and that grabbed their attention. "I went to each of your houses, I found your manors, all of them! Your families are gone. The only one I found was Luna's father and he's hiding in Iceland in a shack, living the muggle way, he snapped his wand and left it all behind." Luna held up her hands to her mouth as she gasped. "Blaise your mother ran for Italy, to hide in a small mountain town…I tried to protect her but they got to her before I could. Astoria, Daphne…there was nothing left to find. Your home was burned to the ground."

"You did that for me?" Blaise asked. "You did that for my mother?"

I nodded. "I made a promise to a girl to protect all of you."

I sat on the beach alone. Kreacher took them all and brought them to Luna's father, she said he would help them. Pansy didn't speak to me before she left, she didn't look at me. I tried to speak to her, I tried to make her stay but she pushed me away and demanded to leave. Daphne and Astoria hugged me but said nothing, I didn't hug them back, I asked them to stay to think about a plan more but they refused. Blaise stated he wanted to go to Italy and find his mum's body, Draco volunteered to go with him before they met up in Iceland, Blaise shook my hand and then hugged me; he thanked me twice and said he was in my debt. Draco and Demelza were the last to leave. Draco smiled at me and said he hoped I would meet up with them soon, I told him it was a mistake, I told him not to go but he said Demelza had made a good plan. He said I was his brother and I hugged him. Demelza was next, she was alone with me for the first time in a long time. She was smaller than I remembered and thinner. I went to hug her but stopped. She smiled at me and then waited for Kreacher to leave. When she was about to leave she handed me a piece of paper that I took after a moment of hesitation.

"Goodbye Harry…" she began as Kreacher returned.

I opened the folded paper and my eyes widened.

"…you should have gone with them."

I leapt for her but a spell hit me in the chest and I was flung backwards, my wand falling. I scrambled in the sand for it, dove for the wand and I shouted for Kreacher but he didn't come. I screamed for Draco for Luna for Pansy, no one came. I swore to the heavens and slammed my fists on the beach. I tried to reach them but I fell to the side, my mind confused and my limbs numb, the spell was kicking in. I tried to crawl to the waves, to go after them but I collapsed and my wand rolled away. My eyes saw the piece of paper and a tear fell. I was alone.

On the paper was three words.

 **You lose Potter**


	3. Harry Potter Must Die

I found Kreacher first, he was still alive but barely breathing; behind his small frame was Tracey…her eyes held death and nothing else. I kneeled beside her for a moment and looked at her, just looked. I had always enjoyed her chatter and banter with the others, she was a bright spot in this void of darkness surrounding us. I regretted how I did not get to know her more, she was friendly and welcoming to me and yet I…I let her down.

I saw the burn on her back, whoever killed my friend did so without her even looking upon the face of her killer, and whomever killed her was a coward for doing such a thing. Kreacher asked me if he was a good elf and I told him he was the best. I cried when he said he protected Tracey's body until he could do so no longer. He told me he tried to save everyone but failed. I told him he was a hero and that no elf could ever be as great a servant to the House of Black like him. I told him he would be remembered. He died a few minutes later with a grin on his twisted old face, muttering about seeing his mistress once again. I cried as I held him…everything I had left of my godfather, the only real father I had ever known, was gone.

I found the remains of Luna's father's house. It was burnt to a crisp and nothing remained. I walked through the smoldering and nauseous smelling wreckage trying to find any bodies but there was nothing there. I found Luna's father ten minutes later behind the house holding a small picture frame, I pulled it from his hands and looked at it. I saw Luna, and I suddenly realized how much I missed her in these moments. She had always been there for me, even sometimes when I didn't want anyone there. Luna was one of the few who had stuck by me through everything and never wavered…there weren't many that could say that. In the picture she was young and was smiling in only the way Luna can and it made me chuckle sadly as her father and her mother waved and laughed to the camera with her. Another tear fell from my eye as I gently placed it back into his hands and that's when I spotted the Hallows necklace around his neck. I thought Luna might want something of him and so I pulled it from his neck, mumbling a small "I'm so sorry" to his figure. Walking back to the house I dug through the burnt walls and furniture for a shovel. Like Dobby…they deserved a proper burial.

It began to rain as I dug the graves but I persisted anyway. I buried Xenophilius first and when I was finished it was nearly dark. When the dirt was over him once again and I could no longer see his body I sat on the wet ground, muddy and exhausted. I sighed as I looked out over the land he had chosen to build his home and silently approved. After a moment I drew myself back up and went to Tracey. I stooped down and took her in my arms, she was light. I placed her body beside Xenophilius' grave and began to dig. I lit a fire a few yards away to give me light, the moon was rising and I wouldn't stop now. Each time I shoved the shovel back into the dirt I felt my palms burst with pain, taking a break I glanced at my right hand and saw my palms were raw and bloody, I wiped the blood on my trousers and set back to work. When her grave was completed I climbed out and picked her up once more, I laid her in the grave and fixed the hair on her head by brushing it away from her eyes. I wiped a few droplets of rain off her face and then climbed out. I said a few words to her grave and then I went to dig the most important of all the graves. I couldn't look at him as I dug and as I did I cried, I bled, and I swore to the heavens I'd find whoever did this. I laid his body in his small grave, patted his chest lightly and then stood. A few minutes later they were sleeping in their final resting places and I was kneeling beside them with my hands aching and my eyes depleted of tears.

"I have to hand it to you Potter…" a voice said from behind me. "…you have a knack for dramatics."

I rose, I knew that voice. "I was wondering when you'd show up, Dean."

Dean Thomas stood before me wearing a pair of dark blue robes with a blood red trim, the damned triangle emblem of the Triumphant was displayed on his right arm. His hair was shaven off and he had a scar under his eye, he looked older than I remember and taller. His left hand held his wand while his right…well he didn't have a right hand.

"No you didn't…" he laughed. "…so do you want to know why I'm here?"

I shrugged as he walked forward, he thought he had the upper hand I could tell, my wand was in the holster on my arm, I was holding a shovel and he was not. He gestured to the fresh graves and I tightened my grip, to which he smirked.

"I was here for them…well Luna's crazy father actually, the rest of you was just a treat. You see we've been getting to work since you left. Your cowardice allowed us the time to move and take note of former associates and friends of yours. Be sure to remember that they're deaths are your fault. Your little gang of death eaters will be next."

"Where are they?"

He shrugged. "We move around a lot, tough to say, hell maybe they're in the Sahara Desert…nice by the way, Ginny was starting to get to me in all honesty, she was too friendly with most of the men if you catch my meaning. I doubt they'll be alive long though…unless of course we want to hold them to get to you? But nah that's too rough."

"Where are they?" I shouted, jumping to my feet. Spit flew from my mouth and I felt my grip tighten even more on the shovel, my face was illuminated by the flames and for the briefest of moments I saw him step back in fear before he remembered what he there to do. He laughed at my rage and I felt a gnawing at my mind, I felt a pull in my heart. He took a step towards me, he looked down for the tiniest of moments and then I acted. I shouted my rage and swung the shovel like a bat, he yelled in pain when it met his knee and he buckled under his own weight. I took a step towards him, hefted the shovel again and stared at him in the eyes. "Tell me where my friends are."

"Go to hell Potter!"

I kneeled down and took the wand from his hand, he was in no form to fight me for it, and tossed it away. Putting the shovel on the ground I took him by the collar, drew him up to look me in the eyes and I asked him again. And yet he answered me in similar fashion, he clutched his shattered knee as best he could, I pushed him back against the ground and stood up.

"If you don't tell me where they are I'll kill you…" I said to him.

He looked at me. "I don't know Potter."

"Are you alone here?"

"What are-"

I rolled my eyes and kicked his knee. "Are you alone?"

He yelped. "Yes, yes, I'm alone."

"Good."

I pulled my wand out of its holster and fired a spell at his knee, the bone was crushed. He yelled in agony as I fired another spell and another, he was still and unable to move, his body numb. I pushed back my long hair over my eyes and kneeled down beside him, I asked him again where my friends were but he was silent. He stared at me blankly and I laughed.

"You come here to boast, you come here to see me defeated and yet you aren't strong enough to take this pain? Do you know how much pain I've been in before? Do you know how much I can take? The answer is simple really…a hell of a lot more. I can take anything you and your group can throw at me, do you know why?" He shook his head, afraid. "I made a promise to keep someone safe…that drives me, that keeps me alive. I've started to figure it all out you know? Tracey and Luna's father…and Kreacher died because of you wanted to get to me, you wanted to hurt me, all of this is about me and I intend to stop this horror show before I lose anyone else I care about. If I have to die Dean…then I will die knowing I kept my promise. That's what is different between your Triumphant and me…" I looked at him with the most emotionless stare and finished my proclamation. "…I'm willingly to die for my friends and family, I was when I fought Voldemort and I am now, nothing has changed except who I'm fighting. If you want a war with me then you will all burn."

Dean tried to crawl away. "Please…"

"You're asking me for mercy?" I yelled at him. "After what you've done to me? I want to know a few things Dean and you will tell me. First of all, where she is? Tell me damn you! Tell me where she is!"

"Who," he mumbled barely inaudibly.

I grabbed him by his robes and dragged him up so he could see the fury in my eyes. I clenched my teeth and rested my wand tip on his cheek, I pushed it against his face and his eyes widened in fear. My eyes were dark, they were blank of emotion as I breathed in deeply to collect my words. I felt my heart beat and I was nervous, I was sailing into uncharted waters, I felt the anger flow into my mind and take hold of my hand as I gripped his robes tighter.

"Where is she? Where is Pansy?" I said so calmly and so emotionlessly that he began to cry as I gripped him tighter. "Where. Is. Pansy?"

"I really don't know! Please!"

I pushed him to the ground. "You're a disgrace."

"Don't kill me," he said quietly.

"Kill you? No I'd never kill you…" I said to him as he stared up at me, I muttered a spell and a streak of fire landed in the damp grass a few yards from him. He was in its path as it crept towards him. "…nor would I help you. That is unless you tell me something important."

Dean tried to move as the fire grew. Sweat beaded down his brow and his fingers tug into the grass as he clawed his way away from the flames. I stepped on his hands and he cried out, falling backwards where he had been a few seconds prior. The flames were near him now, only about a foot away, and the orange flames danced on my face as I stared down at him, waiting, just waiting. I was surprised when he stayed silent even after the flames gnawed at his ankle, making him yelp. He kicked and tried to gain some momentum to move but it was for naught.

"Stop it please!" he shouted.

I grew angry and yelled. "You know what will stop it! Tell me where she is! I want to know now!"

The flames moved up his legs and his cries grew louder and louder, he reached down to try and stamp out the flames but it was no good. Finally he looked up at me, pleading. I ended the spell and he fell back against the grass in considerable pain, I cared little and was growing impatient.

"This is your last-"

"Hogwarts…" he spat at me.

"She's at Hogwarts?"

He nodded, groaning and trying to still his pain. "We took them all there."

"Why?" I demanded.

He stopped moving. "I can't tell you that."

"You're really going to try and hide something? My patience with you is gone, I want answers and if you can't give them to me then you are no use to me."

"The Triumphant are planning to make an example of them to hurt you."

I pondered a few things before I looked down at him. "You have an emergency portkey don't you?"

"Yes…a-are you letting me live?"

I nodded. "Yes…for now anyways. I have a message you are going to bring to your boss. You will tell him word for word, do you understand?"

Dean nodded with a laborious breath.

"Good…" and I leaned down to tell him the message. When I was finished I got up and gave the graves one last look, I vowed to return and give them a proper burial with friends and family around them. I knew what I must do now. If they went after Luna's father than they surely would have gone after the rest of my friends' family. I had to find whoever I could and get them to safety, no matter the cost, and then I would return for Pansy, for Draco, and for the rest of my family.

I turned and glanced at Dean one last time. I told him to leave and he disappeared with a shout of pain. I was alone once again and I felt strong, I felt tired and exhausted, I felt lonely and I felt different within myself. I looked down at my hands and felt the anger surging through my hands still, I had done a terrible thing, I had tortured, I was no better than…than _Him_. And yet, I did not regret what I had done. I needed to find them soon and I needed them alive, I needed to find Pansy, all I could think about is the pain I would feel having to bury any more friends. I sighed and started walking, I had a long night ahead of me.

* * *

I had been studying recent reports coming in from our agents in the field, they had no luck finding Draco Malfoy's mother, his father we had dealt with some time ago and now his body would rot in the swamp he had ran too in America. I placed the papers on the desk and sighed, rubbing my eyes. It had been a tough assignment I had given myself but it was well worth it, I was glad my fellow lieutenants had agreed with my decisions and had done so much work in the time I had been gone. Irritatingly we hadn't been able to return to the place of assignment but we would work on it. I heard a knock on the door and I looked up, the door opened and Hermione walked in, she was wearing her uniform and her hair was tied back into a ponytail. I saw the scar on her face from what Potter had done to her and it saddened me to see it but knew she was stronger for it.

"There's something you need to see," was all she said.

I rose from my chair immediately and followed her down to the Great Hall and then out onto the grounds. There, laying still and barely breathing was Dean Thomas, he was bloody and burned and gasping for help. A few of ours were tending to him but when Hermione and I approached they stepped back.

"Dean told us he has a message for you," Hermione told me.

I kneeled beside Dean and put a hand on his forehead, rubbing it in a gentle way to calm him. He smiled at me as best he could and said he had a message. I nodded and then told him it could wait until he was healed but fear flashed over his eyes and he screeched for me to hear it now. Hermione and I were taken back, as were a few of the others around us, I gave him my full attention.

"Potter told me…told me to tell you something," he said in a whisper. "He told me to tell you that he wouldn't stop, he wouldn't back down…he said he would kill us all. Potter wanted Parkinson the most." He reached out for my hand and I let him take it. "He tortured me, he burned me until I talked. Potter said he'd kill me. He said if you want to fight him we'll all die."

"Take him to the healers," was my simple order and it was followed.

They levitated his body and led him in doors. Hermione bit her lip in thought while Neville approached from the grounds, he was followed by a few of the older agents. From the castle I spotted red hair and the approach of one Ron Weasley. He was limping, a battle-wound from Lucius, but he stood tall nonetheless. He wore civilian clothes as he had just returned from a different assignment. When he came to us he nodded towards Hermione and then to me.

"I heard Potter had made a show of strength."

I shook my head. "No…no he didn't. What he did was seal his fate. He nearly killed an innocent man, Ron. There is no other fate for him than a penalty worse than death for what he has done to us all. He has killed several of our best and brightest, our worst fears are among us."

"He's gone dark…" Hermione said aloud as she finally accepted the reality of our situation and cause. "...we must prepare for the next attack, he will be merciless."

I nodded and looked to the group around me. "We must kill Harry Potter."

"If we must," Ron stated from behind the main circle of agents.

As they walked away I stared into the sky as it began to rain. I clenched my fists, anger rising in my chest as I thought of the past few months, the betrayal I had to face firsthand; the lies he fed me. Potter had had free reign for years, never thinking about those hurt, never stopping his personal crusades. It was time for the era of Harry Potter to end…

"And the name Demelza will forever be remembered," I declared.


	4. Hello

Chapter 4: Hello

One year passed and I had been unable to free my friends, I had tried but the fight was too much for just me. I was exhausted, I was broken and battered. I often went lengths of time without eating, when I did it was barely adequate. I had no idea if they were still alive…if Pansy was still alive. But I never gave up the fight, I never gave in. Days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months. I travelled the world hunting the Triumphant, I fought in the name of the fallen, the truly innocent of us that were killed in order to hurt me. I fought for Kreacher and for Tracey, I fought for the families of Draco, Blaise, I fought for the Greengrass family. But most of all I fought for her, I thought about her all day every day. When I fought, I fought the battle as if I was fighting the battle that would secure her freedom, I missed Pansy and wished for her to be by my side. I bled and nearly died on multiple occasions, I was delirious and envisioned her caring for me as she did Draco all those months ago. I would reach out to her, cup her chin and try to speak to her when I would blink and see the wind wipe the image of her face away.

That led to this moment, the moment I knew I had been fighting long enough.

"Please…" Hannah said blankly.

I sat across from her with my wand on my lap, she stood by the door with her handbag in her left hand and a shopping bag in the other. She looked tired, her eyes were bloodshot and her shoulders sagged. When I didn't answer she nodded sullenly and placed her things on the table near the door and then walked towards the open living room area where I was. She sat on her leather couch, facing me.

"You look horrible Potter."

I didn't say anything but I knew it wasn't a taunt, I glanced to the right where a mirror reflected my image back at me. I hadn't bathed in a few days, having been hiding out on the streets for nearly a week watching the Leaky Cauldron waiting for anything remotely interesting to happen. My clothes were ragged, battle-worn, and I hadn't shaved. My hair was long, it hung in front of my eyes even when I tried to push it back or away from my face.

"I don't know anything."

I shrugged. "We'll see."

"Are you going to kill me?"

I stared at her. "I haven't-"

She pushed a stray strand of hair behind her ear and spoke. "Don't…don't answer that actually. If you are then just do it and then leave, I just ask one thing. Leave my body in a peaceful place okay?"

I knew what she was referring too. Since Ginny I had killed several of our former schoolmates, my former friends and in an attempt to keep them from finding out too soon I would leave them in various places across the world and use their disappearance to draw further people out. At first it worked brilliantly…I should have been proud but I was not. Lately however it had done little and so the latest Triumphant I had faced I did so in the middle of a French wizarding community, I showed my face and within an hour three members had come. They were little match for my power.

"Why are you here?"

"Neville."

She frowned and looked around the room. If this were another life and I was here as a guest I would have complimented her flat but I didn't. The room was full of bookcases and plump furniture, even had a fireplace, which would have been especially nice at the moment as the winter was hitting Britain hard. I stole the clothes I wore and had done so before the snow came, I was usually cold.

"He hasn't been here in a while."

"How long is a while?"

She shrugged, tugging at the sleeve of her overly large sweater. "I don't know, a few weeks maybe?"

"You seem calm."

Hannah again shrugged. "I assumed I was going to die when we fought the Death Eaters and Voldemort, I made peace with the world and if I am to die by your hand I would still be ready to die. You aren't the only one affected by these events."

"I don't care about you."

Silence reigned as she nodded to my words, looking away and out the window. I hadn't drawn the curtains and I wish I had, but if I was to kill her I would do so regardless. Hannah seemed disappointed by my words, she glanced at me again before leaning back in her couch. A tear fell down her face and I sat silently, watching her, my gaze never leaving her.

"I think you did at one point."

"That was before…" I told her honestly, my voice barely audible. "…this is now."

I had been on my own...I don't really know how long, after the first week I gave up counting the days. I missed my friends, I missed Draco and I's morning chats, I missed Luna's laugh. But most of all I missed Pansy, just having her beside me made me feel safe, made me feel normal. She was right about me. I had been fighting too long, she told me once that she believed leaving the wizarding world may be for the best, she wanted to remain on my family's island with the others. If I had only listened…Kreacher and Tracey would still be alive. More people I had failed.

I shot up from my place in the chair when she stood from the couch. My hand snapped forwards, grabbing my wand and I stood with it pointed directly at her. She jumped back and backed away while I stepped towards her, sweat beading down my brow. Her hands up, no wand in sight, Hannah looked scared now…no she looked petrified. She may have accepted she may die but she was still terrified.

"I-I was going to make some tea."

"Say that next time!" I shouted, spit flying from my mouth.

Hannah looked from me to the kitchen and then back to me. "I did…you didn't answer so I got up."

Without another word I gestured to the kitchen and she walked away. When she was out of sight I slumped down into the chair, my wand falling from my hands. I tried to reach for it but my hand was shaking too badly to pick it up, I tried again and once more I couldn't pick it up. My heart was beating so fast it hurt, to breathe hurt and my mind screamed for relief.

Suddenly my wand was placed into my hand.

"Why?"

"I told you…" Hannah said as she looked down at me. "…if I am to die by your hand then I am ready for it. I don't blame you in particular so if you are struggling with the decision then just do it and go, get it over with if you want."

"Are you asking to die?"

She shrugged. "I don't know Potter."

"I want to die."

Hannah looked at me and then nodded. "I know."

Why I was talking to her, why I was telling this…I may never know. But what I did know was she was the first person I talked to for several weeks and in that time I had done terrible things in the name of protecting the innocent. I killed, I tortured, I played a bloody and deadly game with people I once lived beside, learned beside, and ate beside. I hunted for answers…and when I didn't get the answers I wanted, I made sure they would never trouble me again. I had forgotten who I was. If I stared in the mirror I would not remember who I used to be, it was hard to remember the days leading up to our escape from Hogwarts. It was hard to remember and not be angered by the memories.

"Am I a monster…am I like Voldemort? Am I worse?"

"…He murdered because he was evil. You fight for love. We all know, even those of us not a part of the Triumphant plans know who you fight for. Her name is mentioned all the time, the talk of the wizarding world is who Harry Potter, the former Chosen One, is fighting for. Love for the Slytherin Pansy Parkinson fuels Harry Potter's fight…" Hannah stared at me and it was then I realized she was sitting on the coffee table, close to me and her hand on my knee. "…you aren't Voldemort."

"I never wanted this."

She shook her head. "No one wanted this. But you stood up for those people in front of all the people who had become disillusioned by the world, you threatened them, belittled them with your superior power. There are two sides to every story Harry. They made mistakes yes of course…but you did as well. You just have to save everyone don't you?"

"If not me then who?"

"Sometimes...a person isn't supposed to be saved."

I had gone too far. I had fought for too long. I was ready to do the one thing I was not able to before. From my place in the chair I stood and slid my wand back into its holster, without another look in Hannah's direction I walked towards her front door. I could hear her standing, turning to look at me, I could hear her cry softly. Why she was crying I didn't know. Was it because I had spared her? Was it something I had said, something I didn't say?

"Disappear Hannah…they'll come for you if they find out I was here."

She didn't respond at first. Maybe she was trying to find the right words, or maybe she didn't know what to say. But I didn't mind, nothing else needed to be said, in my mind at least. Yes time for talking was over, it was time to end this, to end all of it. I glanced back at her and studied her face for a moment, just as I was going to close the door she called out to me and ran for me. I felt her body come together with mine and she hugged me, I felt nervous, uncomfortable, but I didn't tell her to stop.

"Save her Harry and she will save you."

A moment later I was gone and standing before the gates of the place I had called home for six years. The school brought a smile to my face but soon the smile faded and I pushed open the gates, they weren't locked and I didn't think they would be. It was a long walk up the winding path but I did so without complaints, I strolled towards Hogwarts, my hands in my pockets and my eyes not looking at anything in particular. My hands still shook but I ignored it for now. It was chilly and I was cold.

Eventually I made it to the front of the school and when I stopped, about a good fifty feet from the enormous entranceway, I saw my former friends now enemies standing there waiting. My hands were in my pockets and my wand hidden away. A final fight…oh it would it be a spectacular feat to survive and I expected not too. I saw Hermione and there was Ron, his flaming hair ever a giveaway. Demelza, she was there too. And then my heart skipped a beat, some of the lesser foot-troops of the Triumphant pushed Daphne and Astoria to the front. I saw Luna and then I saw Blaise. Nott was nowhere to be seen but then I felt relief when I saw Draco walk himself out to the front of his tiny group, a wand pointed at his back, but he stood tall, stood straight. His eyes bore into mine and I realized just how much I missed him.

"Harry Potter you…"

Demelza began to speak but I paid her no mind. So she was the leader then, I glanced at her briefly before I began to walk forwards, her voice continued to echo across the distance between me and them but I ignored her. There was one more person I had to find. Draco and Blaise stood beside each other, never giving in to their meddling, they were skinny and tired, just as skinny as I had become. I walked towards them and Draco briefly tried to run to me but Ron walked out and pushed him back into line. That was okay, I needed to find her.

"Is she here?" I asked Draco.

He smiled briefly. Wands were raised as I walked forward but I didn't care. If they were to kill me then I wanted her to be the last thing I ever laid my gaze on. I ignored the angry yells, the threats, the spells threatening to be fired. I ignored Demelza, Hermione, I ignored Ron's hard gaze. I didn't care about the fight, about the Triumphant, all I cared about was Pansy.

"Ever the hero."

Draco's words reached me and I shrugged. "I made a promise."

And that's when I saw her.

"Hello."


	5. An End Becomes a Beginning

Chapter 5: An End Becomes a Beginning

"Hello."

His voice, it sounded so alien to my ears. I don't remember how long it has been since I heard his voice, too long I decided. I wanted to run to him, I wanted to hold him, to cry into his shoulder and beg him never to leave me again. I wanted to run my hand through his hair and feel the warmth of his flesh. Harry looked so tired, his body was thin and his face gaunt, I could see the pain in his eyes, the weight on his shoulders. He was at the end, this was the end for him; I could feel the pain as he stared at me with a frown trying to become a smile. I cried as he looked at me, as if I was the most important thing in the world…but I wasn't. I was just me. Pansy Parkinson…just someone history will forget while he was Harry Potter. He was the one that came back for us; that never gave up on us.

"…Hi," I muttered back, smiling like a silly schoolgirl despite the surroundings and the fight that was soon to occur. I reached for him but soon Hermione Granger came and pushed me back against the one holding the wand to my back. I ignored Granger as I stared at Harry, my Harry.

"I came to keep my promise," he said and then looked at Daphne and Astoria and Blaise, he glanced at Luna with a soft smile before turning to Draco and giving him a single brief smile. "To all of you."

"Potter, it's over," Granger told him and I almost told her to be quiet but he nodded, surprising all of us. Harry stepped back, looking back at me. Granger and the others began to walk towards him and we were pulled to the side. "You can't possibly think you'll win this."

"Of course I don't…" Harry told them, then looked to Demelza. "…You made a fool of me, I bought the stories you fed me. I really had thought you had changed for the better. I was wrong and people died. Good people, innocent people. And all because of you."

She laughed. "You think this is all my doing?"

"Of course it is, you're their leader. This is your movement is it not?"

Demelza looked around and I was stunned when she shook her head. "Potter, you don't get it. This isn't about whose the leader, this isn't about a dark lord, this is about you betraying the wizarding world. True I began the Triumphant, during my schooling I looked up to you, did you know that? I idolized you, you were my hero. Potter for merlin's sake you were all our hero. But I saw through your legend, I saw through it. You didn't fight for us, you fought because the dark lord c _hose you_. We put our lives on the line how many times and all it was for you was what you did, what you lost. You lost your parents yeah, so did a lot of us. We slowly realized what you really were Potter. And that united us. A gathering became a group and a group became a movement, as you put it."

"And what am I?"

"You're selfish," Hermione called out.

"Me? I'm selfish?" Harry laughed, it was an empty laugh and it saddened me. I stood next to Draco who took my hand and squeezed it lightly. I could feel his hand shaking and he feared for his friend. "Do you know what I did for you people?"

"Do you know what we did for you?" Ron shouted back.

"Yeah I do Ron, you betrayed me in fourth year and then left me and Hermione and then you betrayed me again! That's what you did for me. I had your back so many times, I fought for you so many times. I never gave up on you. Not once. I loved you like a brother Ron, I never had that before and you took that from me. That's what you did for me."

Around us the crowd was silent as the main players gravitated towards Harry. Hermione and Ron stepped to the right of Demelza while Neville walked up behind Harry, I was silently glad there weren't more of the professors here at the moment…we had heard they were off at other magical schools trying to gain more support. I wished they'd meet some sort of accident, but I knew it was useless to hope for that.

"I took all memory of me from my parents," Hermione told the crowd with tears falling. "All of that was for you, Potter, I did that so I could fight for you and be there for you."

Harry shook his head. "No, no, no Hermione you did that to protect them. Don't try and fool me, I refuse to listen to any of this rubbish. If you think I am so bad then kill me now. I'm here! Just kill me! Do it damn you! Kill me!"

I was stunned. Harry shouted so loud and so painful his voice tore through me. My tears fell harder as I saw him break down before us, all of us. He was nothing like he once was. His fight had gone on too long, he had gone too far. Harry breathed angrily and his hands shook violently, he shook his head and laughed morbidly when no one moved.

"That's what I thought, you are all too afraid of me. I can fight you all. I will fight you all if I have too and I will take as many down as I can. I am sorry for my mistakes. I am sorry my life has caused the deaths of your parents, your friends and brothers and sisters. If I could give my life to bring them back then I would, I would give my life so willingly if I could bring them all back to you. But I cannot. I am here to get my friends back. I am not leaving until they are released to me."

Demelza shook her head. "I'm sorry Potter but your time has come. They made their choices long ago, it is time they paid for their crimes."

"Their crimes?" Harry yelled. "What about your crimes? What about the people you've killed? The families you've murdered in the name of your cause? What about the houses and lives you've destroyed for your petty beliefs? You're no better than the death eaters we fought before. And you know what? Neither am I. I have killed and I have murdered. I will answer for the things I have done. I will have a penance to serve and so I will. But I will fulfill my promise and if I am to die then I shall die."

"No!" I shouted but I was ignored. I struggled against my captors but they held me back. Harry pulled his wand free as Hermione, Ron, Demelza, and Neville joined in a line with their wands already raised to him. Beside me Draco tried to break free, he tried to get to Harry just as I did. Blaise was shouting and cursing and kicking anyone he could while Luna and the Greengrass sisters attempted to overwhelm their own handlers. My eyes were on Harry, only Harry, as he stood emotionless with his eyes closed. "Harry please!"

"If I am to die…" he muttered his words and I couldn't hear the rest over the scuffle.

"Harry!"

* * *

I heard Pansy shout my name but I ignored her, I had too. This was the end, this was the last fight I would have. It had all been leading to this. I have never known this would be my end but I was content if I were to live long enough for them to escape, I only wished I had the energy left to do so.

Ron made the first move, ever the impatient being he was, and it was sloppy one. I deftly blocked the cutting curse, it bounced off my shield and sped off into the crowd to the right of me, I saw people dive and try to evade it. Neville was next, then Hermione and Demelza simultaneously. Their spells were all the same bludgeoning curse but once again I blocked them. I backed off and they pushed forward. Sweat fell from my scalp as I blocked and evaded, I didn't fire back, only defended. If I were to win I would need to win with brains not brawn.

"Fight me!" Ron shouted, pushing forward faster than the others. Hermione blinked and lost concentration for a fraction of a moment as she turned to see what he was doing and that was my moment. As I dived to the left, away from three yellow spells, I muttered the curse and watched the horrid spell collide with Hermione. Ron and Neville stopped, Demelza fired once more before she realized what had happened. The crowd was quieted by the bookworm fall to her knees, cuts and gashes covering her body. Her eyes looked at me and blinked as tears fell. Ron's mouth was agape, he collapsed to his knees and took her in his arms, she was dead.

I killed Hermione.

* * *

I couldn't believe it. Harry had killed her. He didn't even try to disarm her, he killed her. While everyone watched Granger fall to the ground, followed by Ron falling to his knees, I watched Harry as he picked himself up off the ground and waited. He could have finished off them all, he could have won, but he waited as they saw what he had done. Harry, my Harry, let the enemy mourn as he waited for his demise.

"Please don't die Harry," I spoke so quietly only I heard.

* * *

"You will pay for that!" Neville yelled as he ran forward towards me. I waited until he was close enough, his eyes burned with rage as I waited. He fired off three spells consecutively but I stepped right, left, and left again. They smashed into the ground, snow and dirt flew into the air and made large holes in the ground but I was fine. He swore and fired a killing curse, the crowd's attention was brought back to us as his words flew from his mouth.

I stood firm, the green spell I knew oh so well flying towards me. The spell as green as my eyes. And then, as the spell was barely arm's length away, I conjured my strongest shield. Neville shouted victoriously, thinking he had won, but then the spell smashed into my shield. I ground my teeth together, it should not have been possible, but I blocked the killing curse. The spell's power disintegrated against my shield and I lowered my wand. Neville was pale, suddenly very aware of what he had done and what I had managed to do.

"I am keeping my promise," I said it only because it felt right.

And then we continued to fight. Neville and Demelza fought hard but I fought harder. I dodged right, rolled through the snow to the left, fired two spells and then blocked two. I shouted into the wind, into the snow that began to fall. My spells were powerful and they smashed into their weaker shields. I was using a lot of energy and it was taking a toll. Fighting smart was forgotten as I began to overpower them, my thirst for victory began to creep in; my anger began to take over. Slowly, but surely, I began to take control. I concentrated on Neville first, never even close to the skill I possess.

"Please stop!" He shouted as my bone crusher hit his thigh. He fell to the ground as I fired another into his legs, both knees snapped into dust. I blocked a spell from Demelza, fired another back at her, and then turned to Neville again. With anger searing through my body, I yelled as loud as I could and the spell left my wand. His eyes went blank as the bone crusher smashed into him. His body was tossed through the air and into the crowd of the lesser Triumphant. I breathed deeply, falling to my knees momentarily before shaking my head to clear the tiredness. I leapt back to my feet but not before a cutting curse tore across my back.

I fell to the ground, blood splattering the ground.

"You can't stop now," I told myself. "You have to save her."

I rolled to the right and kneeled. Ron stood a few yards away, his face tear-stricken and holding his and Hermione's wand. He fired another cutting curse, using Hermione's wand, and I wasn't quick enough. The spell hit me in the chest, and then another sliced through my flesh as I tried to block it. Blood began to seep from my wounds. I began to laugh. This is how I would die then, by Ron's hand.

"I loved her!" Ron shouted as he fired another spell that collided with the shield I managed to throw up quickly, but his second spell broke through and it was a bone crusher. My shoulder was broken, I fell backwards. Demelza had stopped fighting, she watched as did the others. They thought I was dead.

"I know you did!" I told him through a mouthful of blood. I spat and pulled myself up. "I will do anything to protect her. If I have to kill you then I will. If…" I blocked another spell, falling back towards the lake. "…if I have to die then I will."

Ron fired another spell and it was the killing curse. For a moment I thought about letting it hit me, letting the world go dark and letting my death come at last. But as the curse sped towards me I eyed Pansy in the crowd. I saw her eyes, exhausted and hurt but alive. She looked so beautiful standing there, I loved her. I had lost so many loved ones already, she was my chance to feel love, true love that my parents had had. Hannah had told me if I save her she would save me…I wanted to die, but I wanted Pansy to be safe.

"I will keep my promise."

And suddenly I was diving to the right. Falling into the snow, the spell flew past and collided with a tree. I scrambled to my feet, bleeding and tired, I vowed to fight harder and longer. My body ached, the grip on my wand was loosening, and I began to cry. I cried for what I've done, I cried for those I killed, I cried for those that died because of me. And I cried for what I was about to do.

Gaining ground on Ron I began to tire him out, he hastily threw up his shields, and they were getting weaker by the minute. One after another my spells smashed into his shields, he grunted and groaned as he tried to fight me off but my spells wouldn't be denied. As the tears fell I quickened my pace, my spells coming out faster and faster and then I knew it was time. Just as my latest spell dropped his shield, I fired off the last curse I would ever utter again…and it was the first curse I ever remembered.

Ron dropped his wand as heard the spell's name. The green spell was undisturbed as it rushed towards him, with a final look at Hermione's body he offered her a small smile and then crumbled to the snowy ground. When the spell hit I lowered my wand, I didn't want to fight anymore.

"It's over…" I said to the crowd.

Demelza shook her head. "No! You have to pay! You murdered them!"

"I will not fight you anymore. Go..." I looked around to the crowd, bent over from pain and bleeding. I glared at the crowd. "…all of you go. I won't look for you, I won't hunt for you. Disappear."

And then I began to walk away. I dropped my wand into the snow and headed down towards the shore of the lake. I wanted to sit and look out at the view one last time. It was hard walking. I expected to be hit and killed by a spell but I wasn't. I didn't look to see if they left, I didn't look to see if anyone was following me. My fighting was over, I couldn't do it anymore.

When I reached the edge of the lake I smiled softly before collapsing to my knees. My arms fell to my sides, my body hurt and my head pounding with a fierce headache as I bled. It was quiet and I enjoyed the silence. Strangely I felt warm, even though I sat in snow and was very close to uttering my last breath, I found a heat rising through my body. Maybe it was the fact I felt comfortable, I felt as ease, I don't know. But I was calm.

And then I felt people around me. Painfully, I glanced upwards and saw Blaise first, he smiled at me as he sat a few feet away. I saw Luna next, she sat beside me and gently placed her hand on my knee while I noticed Daphne and Astoria had joined us as well. They used stolen wands to conjure a roaring fire. The fire felt nice, but I was already warm. That was when I saw Draco, he knelt in front of me, placed his hand on my uninjured shoulder with a careful gaze and offered a smile.

"My friend…" he breathed in deeply, trying to keep the tears at bay. "…it is good to see you."

He moved aside when she came over. She fell to her knees before me and reached out, her hands shook and Pansy's face was dripping with tears. But she laughed and smiled through the tears as her petite hands touched my unshaven cheeks. Pansy leaned forward, at first I thought she was going to kiss me but then she surprised me by falling into my grasp. She cried into me as I held her, my eyes closed behind my cracked glasses and my head resting upon hers. I had her, I finally had her.

And then it went black.

* * *

"I'm nervous," I confided in my best-friend.

He laughed and shook his head, a smile plastered on his lively features. "Of course you are."

"Well what if she says no?"

Draco laughed harder this time. "After what you did for her I highly doubt that."

I breathed in deeply, my hands shaking as I stepped into the kitchen. Around us were our friends…my family. Blaise sat on the counter with the flask I had bought for him oh so long ago, Daphne and Luna sat side-by-side at the table reading something while Astoria stood at the stove, angrily trying to keep Blaise from stealing bits from tonight's meal. And then there was Pansy. She watched Blaise with amusement while I watched her with a careful but loving gaze.

"Oh for merlin's sake…" Draco muttered and then cleared his throat, bringing the room's attention to me. I blanched and then rolled my eyes when Draco laughed harder, his face proud.

"Pansy-"

Before I could continue Astoria exploded with joy. "Oh my god finally!"

"Dear what did we talk about?" Draco sighed, his cheeks blushing as he gave his fiancé a pointed look. She blushed and glanced at everything but me or Pansy while the others smiled, enjoying Draco's embarrassment. However, Pansy stared at me with a quiet gaze and walked towards me.

She looked beautiful.

"You were going to ask me something?" she asked me.

I tried to kneel but couldn't, I began to get frustrated, the others watched silently. Draco stood behind me, ready to catch me if I fell. Since my battle I could barely walk without the help of a cane, I could barely lift my arm and I could barely hold anything without my hands shaking too bad. Pansy put her hands around my waist and slowly she helped me kneel, smiling the entire time.

"Pansy…" I pulled the ring box out, just as I said, my hands shaking. I frowned and tried to open it when she smiled and with a careful hand, opened it to reveal a plain ring with a single diamond. "…will you be mine?"

At first she was silent and simply stared at me. It wasn't the kind of uncomfortable silence that makes you doubt the result, it was a calm and comforting silence as her hands held mine and her eyes looked into mine. I smiled briefly and she smiled back, tears threatening to fall.

I knew the answer.

The End.


	6. Chapter 6

Author's Note

I have reread this story and have seen quite a few plot-holes and other areas I think I can mend. Therefore I will be rewriting the story. However I will keep this story up for fans of the original while posting the rewritten story as an entirely new story. I have several ideas in mind already and will try to update regularly but will most likely update infrequently. The new story will be different in many areas but carry the core of this story. I hope you enjoy.


End file.
